Watch Me Fall To Pieces
by DecemberxAngel
Summary: When Sora is kicked out of his house, he finds himself with no job, no money, and no place to go. What happens when he befriends a kind redhead and her mysterious stepbrother? Sometimes secrets are all people have. SoraxRiku
1. Cold Coffee

_Life sucks. _

That was the only thought going through my head as I looked around my new apartment. Well, 'new' wasn't exactly the best word to describe the run down, cramped, and dismal two-room living area. Maybe 'previously-owned-by-a-drug-runner' apartment would be more fitting.

I sighed heavily before dropping my suitcase and duffel bag on the stained carpet. Deciding that I would unpack later, I walked across the room and turned on the T.V., almost putting my hand through the screen when all I got was static. I went over to the kitchenette and fiddled with the faucet, not surprised at all when the water that came sputtering out was thick and gritty.

I poked around the small space for a little longer. Just when I thought that I would maybe be able to bear living there, a cockroach scuttled along the wall and beneath my little moth-eaten bed. That was it. Grabbing my jacket, I got out of that hell-hole as fast as possible.

It had just rained, and as I stepped out of the apartment complex and onto the street, I was struck by the clean, refreshing smell that always comes after a storm. My mood lifted slightly as I began to walk deeper into the city, the sky overhead obscured by heavy gray clouds. It was a peaceful afternoon, and any normal person would have put their worries aside to enjoy it.

But, of course, I was far from normal. Just a minute or two into my walk, I had already begun to stress about my money situation. When someone gets thrown out of their house, they rarely get a monthly check to go with it. I had spent what little cash I had on the down payment for my apartment, and I barely had enough left to get myself some coffee. Speaking of coffee, I could use something hot…

I veered off my course and ducked into the closest café I could find, a little place called Kairi's. It was warm and cozy, with flowers on every table and a huge glass case proudly displaying the different baked goods that were offered. My mouth watered and my stomach grumbled, pointedly reminding me that I hadn't eaten since the night before.

I made my way to the cash register, where a very pretty red-headed girl was writing something on a notepad. She looked up and smiled sunnily as I approached the counter.

"Hi, I'm Kairi! What would you like?" she asked.

"Hi, I'm Sora!" I replied, "And I'd just like a cup of coffee, please."

The girl happily complied, disappearing into the back of the café for a moment before returning with an oversized mug filled to the brim with sweet-smelling coffee.

"Are you sure you don't want something to go with that?" she asked. "You look awfully hungry."

"Thanks, but I'm not sure I have enough money," I answered, my cheeks flushing slightly with embarrassment. "But the coffee smells fantastic!"

Suddenly, I felt someone's hand on my shoulder. I jumped in surprise, nearly spilling the coffee I had just picked up. I turned around just in time to see a tall, silver-haired man place a ten dollar bill on the counter.

"Pick whatever you want," he told me.

Before I could say anything, Kairi had practically leaped over the counter and wrapped the stranger in a huge hug.

"Riku, it's so nice to see you!" she exclaimed happily. "How have you been?"

The man smiled slightly before returning the hug. "I've been all right. How about you?"

"Great, just great. Wow, I can't believe you're here! Why didn't you call me or anything?"

"…I was busy." Riku released Kairi and looked over at me with sea-green, unreadable eyes. He was dressed in jeans, a black shirt, and a leather jacket. He looked like he might have been nineteen or something. "Who's this?"

"Oh, sorry," Kairi said, and waved a hand at me. "Riku, this is my new friend, Sora. Sora, this is my stepbrother Riku."

"Hi," I said, slightly intimidated by Riku's quiet, icy demeanor. I flushed before handing him back the ten dollars. "You don't have to, really."

Riku didn't say anything, just pushed the money back in my hand. "It's fine. Kairi's right—you look hungry."

Part of me—namely, my stomach—really wanted to accept the money and buy one of those awesome-looking slices of pie. But a larger part of me—my pride—just wouldn't allow it. I may have been disowned, but I sure as heck wasn't to the begging level. Yet.

Slowly, I placed the ten dollars on the counter, along with my final few dollars to pay for my now-frigid coffee. Picking up the mug, I quickly drained it before placing that next to the cash register as well.

"Thanks for the coffee," I said. Both step-siblings looked at me; Kairi with open curiosity, and Riku with something I couldn't read. "It was nice meeting you both."

Shoving my hands in my pockets, I walked past them and onto the street. I hadn't gone three steps before it started raining. _Great,_ I thought miserably, _first I had to go and be a complete jerk to Kairi and Riku, and now this. _

Lowering my head, I kept walking down the street as the rain began to fall even harder. In seconds I was soaked completely through. Luckily, though, my apartment was only a block or two away.

It wasn't until I was standing in front of my door that I realized I had locked myself out. And, because God loved me so much, my apartment was one of those that opened onto an open-air hallway. So there I was, pounding futilely on my door as rain and wind relentlessly pounded me on the back.

After ten minutes of throwing curses at the sky, I walked back onto the street and began to wander aimlessly around as the sun started to set. It was dark and still raining when I made my way into a little park that was nestled behind some very large, very corporate-looking buildings. I found a park bench that was at least partially sheltered by some limp, sickly trees. I huddled on it, the hard wooden slats digging into my back. Despite the horribly miserable conditions though, I was asleep in minutes.

"Do you make it a habit to spend the night in parks?"

Startled out of my sleep, I opened my eyes blearily to see that silver-haired man from the day before standing over me, an amused smile on his face. It took me a moment to remember his name, but when I did I said it out loud.

"Ri…Riku?"

"Yes?"

"Why are you here? How did you know I was here?" God, my head was killing me.

"I didn't know you were here." He pointed at one of those office buildings behind me. "I work there. I was on my way in when I saw you over here on the bench. Now, once again, why are you in the park?"

I opened my mouth to answer, but instead a monstrous sneeze exploded out of me. I then proceeded to collapse into a very violent coughing fit that left my chest burning and me gasping for breath. My head pounded wickedly. I swear I could hear my brain screaming as it swelled so much it would burst.

Riku sat next to me on the bench and placed a cool, elegant hand on my forehead. "You have a severe fever," he informed me as I started coughing again. "Come on, I'm taking you home."

I shook my head, wincing at the pain the action brought. "I locked myself out of my apartment," I explained.

Riku shook his head as well. "No, I meant I'm taking you to _my_ home. Well, Kairi's home, anyway; she's letting me stay there while I'm in town. She has the day off. She'll take care of you."

I wanted to argue, but I was too sick to even think straight.

"Fine," I sniffled, and then sneezed. I made as if to stand up, but Riku suddenly was on his feet and picked me up bridal-style. I blushed furiously, hoping that I was red enough from the fever for it to blend in. Unfortunately, judging by the small smirk the taller man wore, I wasn't.

"You're too sick to walk," he said, but that didn't stop me from deepening in color until I was rivaling the fire hydrants lining the sidewalk. Riku carried me to his car, a sleek black Jaguar, and set me down in the front seat. He slid into the driver's seat, buckled his seatbelt, and turned the ignition on. "Bleed It Out" blasted from the speakers.

"Linkin Park?" I asked, trying vainly to smother my coughs.

"Is that a problem?" he replied.

"No, I love them," I answered.

Riku nodded and began driving, heading towards God knew where. If I had known what was going to happen, I would have thrown myself from the car then and there.

But unfortunately, life just doesn't work like that, now does it?


	2. I Hate Being Sick

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts

The rest of the car ride passed in silence, with Riku concentrating on driving while I shivered and sniffled miserably next to him.

"We're here," the silver-haired man finally said, pulling up in front of a really nice looking two-story house.

I opened the car door and got out. "I can walk," I said stubbornly, even though my legs were shaking like jelly. Still, I made my way determinedly toward the door, Riku shaking his head with an amused smile as he followed behind me. By the time I made it to the porch, I was breathing so hard you would've thought I just finished a triathlon.

Before Riku could knock on the door, Kairi flung it open.

"Sora!" she said in surprise, "What happened to you?"

"He's sick, Kairi. Would you look after him today?" Riku motioned to where I was huddled on the ground, fighting several huge sneezes that threatened to tear my nose apart.

"Of course! Get in here, Sora, and I'll make you some tea." Kairi helped me up and began to lead me inside. I turned around, though, and looked curiously at Riku, wondering why he wasn't coming in, too.

"I have to go to work," he said, as if reading my thoughts. "I'll be back in the evening. Feel better, Sora."

He turned and walked down the driveway to his car and got in before I could say a word. Kairi closed the door, cutting off my view of her mysterious stepbrother. She led me to the couch and stepped back, looking at me disapprovingly.

"Look at you, you're filthy!" she exclaimed. "And your clothes are soaked. No wonder you're sick. Come on, go take a shower while I fix you something to eat."

"But I…don't have…any clothes," I replied between coughing fits.

"No problem; you'll just have to borrow some of Riku's." I was about to argue, but Kairi's look left no room for discussion. Defeated, I allowed her to lead me to the shower.

It felt really good to finally get clean again. I stood there for a good ten minutes, just letting the scalding water pour over me. Once I was washed and dried, I stepped out of the shower to see that Kairi had left some of her stepbrother's clothes sitting next to the sink. I blushed; it was a little awkward to be borrowing clothes from someone I barely knew. Still, it was that or go naked. I pulled on the sweatpants and long-sleeved shirt, both which were a little too big for me. Padding out of the bathroom, I saw that Kairi had placed a pillow and blanket on the couch for me.

"Come lay down," she said, "You need to rest."

I blushed hotly. "You really don't have to do this," I said, embarrassed. "I don't want to inconvenience you."

"Nonsense," the redhead said kindly. "What are friends for?"

On her request I laid down, my head spinning. Friends. It was a foreign thing to me. I didn't have any friends. I never did. I was extremely shy and insecure, and usually wound up sitting by myself and writing. That's what I did. I wrote poetry and short stories. It was the only thing that distracted me from my loneliness.

And now I had friends. It was a strange feeling. Strange, but nice. Very, very nice.

My head felt like it was going to split. I coughed violently into my pillow, trying to muffle the sound so as not to alarm Kairi. My chest was on fire. Take my advice; never, ever sleep in a park while it's raining.

I fell asleep several minutes later. When I woke up again it was three in the afternoon. Kairi made me eat some soup and drink some tea, and I fell asleep again. The next time I came to, it was seven at night and Riku was home.

"How are you feeling?" he asked me as Kairi checked the thermometer that had been in my mouth.

"One hundred and two," she said aloud. "Wow, Sora, you are one sick puppy."

"I'm okay," I said weakly. "I'll get out of your guy's hair now. Thanks for all your help."

I went to stand up, but Riku pushed me back onto the couch. "There's no way you're going any where with that kind of fever," he said firmly. "You'll stay here until you get better."

"But--" I started.

"Nope," Kairi interrupted. "We'll take care of you, don't worry."

I opened my mouth to argue, but I knew it was useless. I coughed roughly before letting my head drop back onto the pillow.

"It's settled, then," Riku said with satisfaction. "Now, get some sleep."

"That's all I've been doing," I groaned, but a few moments later I was out.

When I woke up again, it was completely dark out, and my stomach wasn't happy at all. Retching, I barely scrambled into the bathroom before throwing up very violently into the toilet. I kneeled there heaving for at least five minutes. Finally, I thought it was over. Sitting back against the cold porcelain of the tub, I gulped down huge breaths of air, begging my stomach to stop churning.

"You okay?"

I looked up to see Riku standing in the doorway, a concerned look on his usually emotionless face. I nodded shakily, breathing heavily.

"I'm—I'm fine," I said. Suddenly, my stomach decided that it wasn't through trying to combust. I threw myself back over the top of the toilet, vomiting like there was no tomorrow.

I heard Riku kneel next to me as I proceeded with emptying my body of _everything_. He soothingly rubbed my back, giving me some much needed comfort. After several minutes the bout was over. I sat back, cold sweat streaming down my face and back. I looked down to see that the last heave had brought up blood. It was spattered on the rim of the toilet and all over the floor. I wiped my hand across my mouth, grimacing at the streak of pink and red froth that was left behind.

"Sora, maybe we should take you to the doctor," Riku said. "This is really serious."

I had begun shaking my head the moment he mentioned the word 'doctor.' "I don't have insurance, and I couldn't ask you to pay for the appointment. Really, I'm fine. It's just a cold."

Riku stood up and filled a cup with water for me. I gulped it down gratefully, feeling my stomach finally quiet.

"I think it's over," I said. "I'm gonna go back to the couch. Thanks, Riku."

The silver-haired man smiled slightly before helping me back to the couch. I sank onto the cushions with an exhausted sigh. Riku left without a word. Assuming he was going back to bed, I closed my eyes and tried to fall back asleep.

I was taken by surprise, then, when the man came back into the room with a blanket and a pillow.

"What are you doing?" I asked him incredulously.

"If you start getting sick again, I want someone to be here," he said matter-of-factly. He spread the blanket on the ground and lay down. "Good night, Sora."

I just sat there, propped up on my elbow, with my mouth hanging open in shock. "But…you barely know me," I finally said. "Why are you doing so much to help me?"

Riku didn't answer for a moment. "I'm not sure," he finally answered. "For some reason, though, I have the feeling that if our places were switched, you'd do the same for me."

The answer didn't make much sense to me, but I sensed that the conversation was over. With a sigh and a mumbled 'goodnight,' I flopped onto my side and fell asleep.

The next few days passed by rather uneventfully. Kairi stayed home from the café to look after me, and Riku left early in the morning and didn't get back until late at night. I spent almost every hour sleeping, my body trying desperately to fight off my illness.

Finally, four days after I had come to Kairi's house, my fever broke.

"Ninety-nine," she said satisfactorily. "You're on your way to getting better, Sora."

"I feel better," I answered, and this time I wasn't lying. My head had stopped hurting, and my coughing had become less and less frequent. Soon, I would be well enough to go home.

At that thought, my mood fell drastically. Even though I had been with Kairi and Riku for only a few days, I felt more at home there than anywhere I'd ever been, including the home I had been raised in. And what was my home now? A crappy, cockroach-ridden apartment? Maybe I should spend more rainy nights in the park.

"Everything okay, Sora?" Kairi asked me, concern on her kind face.

"Of course, Kairi. Why wouldn't it be?" I replied, faking a smile. "But I've really taken up enough of your time. I should get back to my apartment soon."

"Are you sure?" the girl inquired. "You can always stay here."

"Thank you, but I just couldn't." That'd be typical. Little Sora, leeching off someone else because he was too incompetent to take care of himself. "I'll come visit you at the café."

"All right," Kairi reluctantly conceded, "but at least wait until Riku comes home to say goodbye."

I laughed. "It's not like I'm dying or anything. I'm just going ten blocks north."

Since I felt horribly uncomfortable staying any longer than was necessary, I grabbed my old clothes, hugged Kairi goodbye with the promise that I'd stop by the café the next day, and headed out the door and down the street. I hadn't walked more than a block when a familiar black Jaguar pulled up beside me.

"Where are you going?" Riku asked, rolling down his window. I pointed toward my part of the city.

"To my apartment," I replied. I'd never call it a home. It wasn't a home. "Thanks for everything you've done for me, but I've worn out my welcome."

"Don't be ridiculous," Riku snorted, but when he realized I was determined not to bother them any longer, gave in with a sigh. "Well, at least let me give you a ride there. You're still sick."

A ride. I could use a ride. With a grin of thanks I hopped into the passenger seat, rattling off directions to my apartment as I did so. We didn't talk much on the ride over, preferring to listen to music instead of idle chatter.

Ten minutes later we reached my apartment. "Thanks for the ride," I said. "I'm visiting Kairi at her café tomorrow night."

"Maybe I'll see you there," Riku replied. I waved as he pulled out of the driveway and back onto the street. I walked back up to my apartment and had to kick in the door to get inside.

I unpacked, which took me about thirty seconds, and then set about making the place look a little more livable. Livable. Ha. I must have done battle with at least twelve cockroaches in the first hour. I straightened up as best I could and scrubbed the kitchenette down before finally being somewhat satisfied with how the place looked.

Once I was done with my impromptu 'spring cleaning,' I plopped down on the bed and pulled out my notebook. I carried that thing everywhere I went. It held everything, from random diary entries to poetry to stories. Chewing the tip of a pen, I formulated a small poem and hastily scribbled it down. It wasn't exactly my best work, but it was something. I ripped out the page and taped it to the wall, determined to work on it more later. At that moment, I needed to think about finding a job.

The prospects didn't look too good for me. Not a lot of places would hire a seventeen-year-old boy full-time. The most I could hope for was something at a fast-food restaurant. Not that there was anything wrong with that, but it wasn't what I wanted to do. I wanted to write. More specifically, I wanted to write lyrics. I sucked at melodies, but if someone gave me one I could write the words to it with ease.

But that dream was very far away. Right then, I needed to find a fast solution to my money problem. I glanced at the clock and saw that it was nine at night. Too late to look for a job then. I sighed and got ready for bed, promising myself that I would start looking for work first thing the next morning.

Easier said than done. By four the next day, I was tired and discouraged. Every place I had gone, even the fast-food places, weren't hiring. That figured—of course, the moment I needed a job, every staff position was filled up. Either God hated me or he had a really twisted sense of humor. I opted for both.

_Well, I should head over to Kairi's, _I thought, more than happy to find a reason to stop my fruitless look for work. It only took me about ten minutes to reach the cozy little café. When I walked in, I was surprised to see how packed it was. Every table was full, and there were even people standing around and eating.

Figuring that Kairi would be busy enough, I turned around to leave. Before I could even open the door, though, I heard a familiar voice right behind me.

"Not leaving already, are you?"

I turned around and smiled at Riku. "Just thought Kairi had her hands full enough without me here," I answered.

Riku rolled his eyes. "Are you always so self-deprecating?" he asked. "Come with me; I'm buying you dinner."

"But--" I started to protest, but Riku raised his hand.

"Will you just let someone do something nice for you? I promise I'm not expecting anything from you in return."

I flushed, but followed Riku as he headed behind the counter and into the kitchen, away from the crowd. Kairi was there, talking with a brunette girl that was wearing the same uniform Kairi was. When we walked in, the redhead looked up from her conversation and waved.

"Hi Sora!" she greeted cheerily. "This is my coworker, Selphie. We own this café together."

"Hi," I said, "It's nice to meet you."

Selphie smiled cheerily. "Hi," she replied.

"Would you like something to eat?" Kairi asked me.

I was about to shake my head, but at a look from Riku, I sighed. "Yeah, that'd be great," I said. Honestly, I was starving, but the last thing I wanted was for Riku to spend any money on me. However, I didn't really have a choice in the matter.

Kairi handed me a monstrous plate piled high with spaghetti. I dug in hungrily, savoring every hot and filling bite. Riku got himself a cup of coffee and sat down next to me, not saying a word.

"So, Sora, where are you working these days?" Kairi asked me.

I nearly choked on my mouthful of pasta. "Um, well, I kinda don't have a job," I answered. "I just moved here about a week ago. I looked for someplace to work, but there's nowhere that's hiring. Do you know anywhere that'll hire a seventeen-year-old?"

Kairi and Riku exchanged a look, and then the girl glanced over at Selphie. "Oh no," I said, already knowing what they were going to say.

"Why not?" Selphie inquired. "We need another hand around here. Things are getting way to busy for just two people."

"But, I couldn't--"

"Sora." Kairi glared at me firmly. "You need a job. We need another employee here. You're not leeching off of us or anything—_we're hiring you_."

I opened and closed my mouth several times before finally giving in. Kairi's logic was unarguable, and besides, I really needed the job.

"It's settled then," Kairi said with a smile. "Can you start tomorrow?"

"Yeah," I said. "I'll be here."

Biggest mistake of my life.


	3. Crash

I arrived at the café at eight the next morning. There were just a few people there, mostly business men and women who had a few extra minutes before work. I settled myself behind the counter as Kairi called out a hello from the kitchen.

"Your apron's on the hook behind the register," she said. I looked over to see a red apron hanging just where she said it would. I tied it on, having to double-wrap the strings around my thin waist. I had lost a lot of weight since leaving my old home, mostly due to the fact that I usually didn't have any money for food. Most of my clothes were too big for me now.

My first day was pretty calm. It wasn't too crowded at lunch, and during the couple hours between then and dinner Kairi, Selphie, and I got to hang out and talk. I was starting to think that I could handle the whole café thing when dinner rolled around.

It was like the whole city rushed through the door. In minutes the entire place was packed to the roof with people. I had my hands full with taking orders, trying desperately not to get anything mixed up. Kairi and Selphie were in the kitchen, frantically cooking dozens and dozens of meals. The air was filled with conversation and laughter, and the café smelled like pasta and coffee and bread.

Around nine o'clock the crowds finally dispersed. I sighed in exhaustion, wiping a hand across my forehead. "Is it always this busy?" I asked in disbelief.

Kairi nodded, a streak of flour standing out against her pale cheek. "Every night," she said. "We're the only place to eat in this area of town."

"How did you guys do it all alone?" I inquired. "It was hard enough with all three of us."

"It wasn't easy," Selphie said. "We usually have people waiting for an hour before getting a table."

"But the good thing is, the tips are great," Kairi said with a smile.

We all laughed. I poured us coffee, and as we stood around and took a break, the door jangled merrily to signal someone's arrival. I looked up to see Riku walk in, looking thoroughly exhausted.

"Hey Riku," Kairi greeted her stepbrother, "Long day at the office?"

Riku nodded wearily. "I hate working with those imbeciles," he said, pulling a chair up to the counter. "I can't wait until I go back home."

"How much longer are you staying here?" Selphie asked.

"For as long as I need to," Riku replied. "I have some…business I have to attend to."

I was curious about what he meant by 'business,' but I didn't want to intrude on the conversation. Instead, I poured a large cup of coffee for the silver-haired man and handed it to him. He gave me a small smile in thanks and proceeded in pouring copious amounts of cream and sugar into the cup. I made a face; I liked my coffee black.

"How was your first day, Sora?" Riku asked me suddenly.

"Great," I answered. I liked the way that he said my name. For some reason, people have problems pronouncing it right, but Riku said it perfectly. "Despite the fact that I'm the only guy here."

"Oh, don't act like you're not happy about that," Selphie teased. I stuck my tongue out at her.

"Well, Sora, why don't you come with me and we'll go get some dessert or something? It'll give you a break from the girls," Riku said, running a finger around the edge of his coffee cup.

I raised my eyebrows, surprised. Riku wanted to hang with me? I never really thought he even noticed me that much. I mean, for one thing, he was older than me, and he had a really nice job, and he just seemed so cool and sophisticated—basically, everything I'm not.

I guess the pause I took to think was too long, because Riku suddenly looked uncomfortable. "It's okay if you don't want to," he started, but I waved him off.

"No, it sounds great. I was just thinking." I took off my apron and hung it up before waving goodbye to the girls. "See you guys tomorrow!"

"Bye," Kairi and Selphie said at the same time. Without really thinking, I grabbed Riku's hand and pulled him out of the café.

Once we were outside, I realized that I still had his hand. Blushing, I let him go. "Where do you want to go?" I asked, suddenly shy.

"Well, there's an Italian place about fifteen minutes away," Riku said. "Want to go there?"

"Sure!" I said happily. "I'm starving." Even though I worked in a café, we had been so busy that I hadn't eaten all afternoon.

Riku smiled slightly before leading me to his car. I hopped into the front seat, bouncing up and down like a kid. Riku slid into the driver's seat and started the car.

"Where do you live?" I asked him suddenly. I had been wondering about that ever since he had said that he was just here on a business trip. He glanced over at me, aquamarine eyes bright.

"…I don't really have a set home," he answered. "I go from city to city, wherever my employer sends me."

Once again, I wondered what he did for a living, since all I knew was that he worked in one of the big buildings by the café. Before I could ask, though, he surprised me with one of his own questions.

"You said yesterday that you just moved here. Do you live alone?" he asked me.

"Yes," I replied, hoping he wouldn't pursue this line of questioning. Unfortunately, he did.

"But you're seventeen. That seems a little young."

"Yeah, well…" I stopped, not wanting to expound on this unpleasant topic. But Riku had other things in mind.

"Do you still go to high school?" He wasn't letting me dodge the questions that easily.

"No. I graduated a year early."

"Why'd you move here, then? Shouldn't you be with your family?"

I sighed, knowing this was going to come up sooner or later. I still didn't want to answer him, though. "…"

"Sora?"

"Let me out."

"What?" Riku looked at me in surprise.

"Let me out. I want to go home." I knew I was being a jerk—after all, he just wanted to get to know me—but his questions had brought up a lot of bad memories and feelings. If I didn't leave then, I was going to cry. And I couldn't do that in front of Riku.

We were at a stop light, and before Riku could say a word, I flung open the door and ran from the car. Slamming the door, I didn't look back as I ran across the street and toward the sidewalk, dodging the traffic that had started to move.

"Sora? Sora, wait!" I heard Riku call out from his car.

My shoe slipped, and I stumbled. An oncoming car tried desperately to break, its horn screaming at me, but it was too late. The front of the car slammed into my side, and I rolled up and over the hood to crash onto the asphalt below. My shoulder and arm were in agony, and I felt warm blood soaking through my jeans.

I still didn't stop moving, though. I painfully pulled myself to my feet and kept running, down the street and toward my apartment. I didn't stop running until I was in front of my door. Taking out my key, I unlocked it and crashed into my apartment, slamming the warped door behind me and locking it. I knew Riku would be coming here—after all, he did see me get hit by a car. Or maybe he wouldn't come at all. Maybe I was right all along and he didn't care about me. It wouldn't be the first time that I was abandoned when injured.

Oh great, I was going to start crying again. I stumbled into my cramped little bathroom to evaluate my injuries. The headlight of the car had broken when it hit me, and jagged pieces of the heavy plastic were buried in my leg, hence the large amount of blood. My shirt was torn, and my shoulder was missing a lot of skin. Bruises were all down my arm and side, and I had a long cut on my cheek, but luckily nothing was broken.

Limping to the cabinet, I pulled out the first aid kit and sat down on the bathroom floor to fix myself up. My jeans were ruined, and I had to use scissors to cut away the sticky cloth from the headlight gashes. As I prepared myself for the pain of removing the pieces of headlight still stuck in me, there was a frantic pounding on my door.

"Sora, are you all right!?" It was Riku.

"I'm fine, Riku! Go away!" I shouted back, not wanting him to see me like this. I was far from fine, but he didn't need to know that.

"Sora--"

"Really, I'm all right. I'm sorry about tonight. I'll make it up to you, I promise."

There was silence from the other side of the door. Thinking he was gone, I grasped the biggest shard that was in my leg. Biting down on my bottom lip, I yanked it out. It was huge, at least five inches long, and blood gushed from the wound as the headlight piece slid out. Agony burst in my leg, and I cried out in pain.

"Sora!" Crap. He was still here. "Sora, let me in."

I squeezed my eyes shut and rested my head against the cabinet, dizzy from the pain. I didn't say anything, not having the strength to shout. I could only hope he'd give up and go away.

Taking a deep breath, I grabbed the next shard and pulled that one out as well. I choked back a scream; this one wasn't as big, but it was deeper in my leg. Tears blurred my vision.

Suddenly, there was a sharp crack as the lock on my door broke. Riku had kicked the freaking door open. The silver-haired man came running in, worry all over his face.

He gasped when he saw me on the bathroom floor, sitting in blood and pieces of my jean leg. He fell to his knees beside me, face flushed.

"Sora, you're really hurt," he said.

I tried to smile, but failed miserably. "Thanks for letting me know. I didn't notice."

Riku didn't laugh. Instead, he began searching through my first aid kit, coming back up with a bottle of antiseptic.

I watched him curiously, pain making my vision fade in and out. Stupid car. The silver-haired man soaked a cotton ball in the antiseptic and began dabbing at the gashes in my leg.

I gasped at the fiery sting of the liquid on my cuts. "Riku, don't…" I managed to choke out.

He looked at me, his eyes a mixture of sympathy and callousness. It frightened me. "Sorry, Sora, but you'll get infected otherwise." He went back to work, ignoring my whimpers of pain. "Why'd you run like that? It was a pretty stupid thing to do."

I opened my mouth to answer, but was stopped by a particularly sharp burst of pain when Riku's cotton ball touched my deepest gash.

The pain was too much. My vision swam for a moment before I passed out completely.

When I woke up again, I was back on Kairi's couch. "You've got to be kidding me," I groaned.

Kairi walked in from the kitchen, her hands covered in suds from doing the dishes. "Good, you're awake." She narrowed her eyes at me. "You pulled a pretty nasty stunt there, Sora. You could have been killed."

"You think?" I snapped back, trying to sit up and failing. "I've been trying to tell everyone that cars should be made of sponge or something."

"Stop joking." Kairi dried off her hands and came to sit next to me. She fixed me with a stern gaze, making me drop my own eyes to the blanket that was covering me. "You really scared Riku. He thinks this is his fault."

"What?" I asked in surprise. "Why would he think that?"

"Well, you ran out of his car after he asked you a question. What else is he supposed to think?" Kairi shook her head in sadness. "I know that he can seem like he doesn't care, but he is really sensitive to certain things, especially when it comes to people he feels responsible for. If they get hurt, he tears himself apart."

"He…he feels responsible…for me?" I stammered. I didn't want him to feel like that. I was enough of a burden already.

"Yes, he does."

I sighed heavily. "Where is he now?" I asked.

"Work."

I tried sitting up again and succeeded. My arm and shoulder were tightly bandaged, and so was my leg. I swung myself up off the couch and tested my weight on my injured leg. It hurt, but I could support myself.

"What do you think you're doing?" Kairi demanded.

"I'm going to go see Riku." I stood up and swayed slightly. The room spun for a moment before going still again.

"No you're not." Kairi crossed her arms firmly. "It's only been two days since the accident. You have to rest."

"Kairi," I said, exasperated. "If Riku is feeling this badly about it, I have to go apologize to him. I can't let him think this is his fault."

We argued heatedly for a few minutes before she finally consented. With a sigh, she grabbed her car keys and helped me to the car. As we silently drove toward Riku's office, only one thought was going through my mind.

What the heck was I going to say?


	4. What I Never Told You

Twenty minutes later, I found myself hesitantly knocking on a closed office door, still unsure of what I'd do when I saw Riku. Kairi stood silently beside me, discreetly helping me stand up. Her expression was stony, but I could still tell that she was pretty pissed off at me. I just hoped she wouldn't push me over or something.

The door was opened a few moments later by a very surprised Riku. "What are you doing here?" he asked, caught off-guard.

Kairi looked from me to him to me again. "I'll wait in the lobby," she said, and stepped back to catch an elevator. The unexpected absence of her support left me swaying dangerously on my uninjured leg. Riku reached out and grabbed me, carefully helping me to a chair. Once I was safely seated, he closed his office door, giving us privacy.

A very awkward silence ensued, stretching on for what seemed like forever. I nervously played with my hands, unable to say anything. _Come on, you idiot, _I thought fiercely. _You had Kairi drag you all the way over here, so say something!_

"So…" Riku said, finally breaking the silence. I looked up at him, but he wasn't looking back at me. His blue-green gaze was directed out the window, toward the park where he found me. That seemed like years ago now.

Gathering up my courage, I opened my mouth. "Listen, Riku," I started, but suddenly the door banged open to admit several people that were arguing loudly.

"I think you're wrong," one of them said with a stubborn tone. He was the same height as me (which wasn't saying much,) with spiky blond hair and brilliant blue eyes. His friend, a tall, wild-haired redhead with piercing emerald eyes, snorted.

"And I think you're an idiot," he retorted. He turned to Riku, who was glaring at them both with annoyance. "Riku, help us settle something. If I told Xaldin that I was feeling sick, like, spontaneously-combust sick, do you think he'll give me the day off tomorrow? I think he will."

"I think he's wrong," the blond put in. "He's skipped out on work enough that if he even mentions it, Xaldin with kill him right there. What do you think?"

"I think both of you should go take turns swallowing window cleaner," Riku replied venomously. God, that guy must have been having a really horrible day.

Suddenly, the blond one noticed that I was sitting there. "Who's this?" he asked. The redhead grinned.

"I don't know, but he's cute," he said, causing me to turn beet red. He crossed the room and ruffled my hair. "I'm Axel, kid. Got it memorized?"

"I'm-I'm Sora," I stammered, suddenly very shy. There was just something about him that was intimidating—just like Riku the first time I had met him. The blond one smiled and put out his hand. Hesitantly, I shook it.

"Hi, Sora, I'm Roxas," he greeted kindly. "Please ignore Axel—he's a complete moron."

"Shut up, shorty," Axel snapped back good-naturedly. He grinned that half-insane grin at me again. "I've never seen you around here before. Are you new? 'Cause if so, I could show you around the place. Roxas and I know everybody. Riku's just a temporary—"

"He doesn't work here," Riku interrupted icily. Axel's eyes widened, and he abruptly snapped his mouth shut with an audible click.

Temporary? What was Riku a temporary of? Thousands of questions burned inside me, but I got the distinct feeling that I shouldn't pry. Dang. I had been so close to figuring something out.

"Well, anyways," Roxas said, trying to break the sudden tension in the room, "How do you know Riku?"

"Yeah, he isn't the type to have friends," Axel said, as if forgetting that the silver-haired man was even in the room.

"I work at his stepsister's café," I replied. My voice sounded meek and small. God, what was wrong with me? Why did I feel so insignificant? But at the same time, I knew exactly why. Riku, Axel, Roxas—they all just had this air about them of absolute superiority and confidence. It wasn't anything arrogant; you just got the feeling that they could kill you without a thought. Like they had complete control of themselves and the world around them. Whereas I was at the complete opposite of the spectrum. Hah, I couldn't even kill a cockroach.

"Really? That's cool," Roxas said, but I could tell he wasn't particularly interested. After a few more awkward moments, the blond man put his hand on Axel's shoulder. "Come on, we gotta go see Marluxia about tomorrow's assignment."

"Fine," Axel replied. But, before he left, he scribbled two numbers down on a piece of paper he had pulled from his pocket. Handing it to me, he said, "Here, this is my and Roxas' numbers. Call us sometime. We should all hang."

"T-thanks," I stammered out, and before I knew it they were gone. Riku and I were once again left alone in his office, both of us unsure of what to say.

"You're not really going to call them, are you?" Riku finally asked. I stuffed the numbers in my pocket.

"Why not? They seemed nice."

Riku smirked. "Trust me, they're both trouble, especially Axel."

_Why do you care?_ I thought, and almost said aloud, but thought better of it. Instead, I said, "Listen, Riku, I'm really sorry about what happened."

Riku looked at me, expression unreadable. "What? You jumping out of my car or getting hit by one?"

"Both," I mumbled, cheeks reddening. "I was stupid. It's just…nevermind."

"What is it?" Riku's eyes had a bit of concern in them now; not much, though. He still seemed more angry than concerned.

"It's nothing," I said. "It's not that important."

Riku sighed heavily. "I know that you've only known me for a little while, but that doesn't mean you can't trust me. And I'd really like to know what caused you to jump out of my car and onto the hood of another one."

I twisted one of my wristbands around my wrist, the cloth rough against my skin. What was I supposed to say? If I started talking, I'd start crying. And he thought I was weak enough already. Maybe if I jumped out the window, I could get away from all this…

"Fine," I answered, then fell silent. Riku didn't say anything, just waited patiently. At last, I started talking.

"You asked me why I wasn't with my family, right? Well, it's because I don't have a family. Well, one that cares, anyways." I took a deep breath. This was going to be hard. "I was an only child. I didn't get along with my dad. He wanted me to go to college and be a doctor; I wanted to study abroad and be a writer. It seems like most of our conversation were fights.

'Two months ago I was grounded for some stupid reason. There was a party going on at a classmate's house, and everyone was going, including my friends. They wanted me to come, but I didn't want to piss my dad off any more than he already was. But there was alcohol at the party, and I knew my friends would be drinking, and the last thing I wanted was for them to get behind the wheel of a car. So I snuck out to go, just so they would have someone as their designated driver.

'They were drunk in about an hour. It was twelve and I convinced them that it was time to go home, but when we went outside I discovered that my car had been stolen. There was no choice; I had to call my parents to tell them where I was. My dad was furious, but my mom said she'd come to get me and my friends.

'On the way over she was hit by another car and died instantly. My father blamed it on me, saying that if I hadn't gone to the party none of this would have happened. He kicked me out a few hours after the funeral. I've been alone ever since."

By the time that I'd finished my story, tears were streaming down my face. It felt good to get everything out, but at the same time I still hadn't gotten over my mother's death. That wound would never, ever heal.

Riku didn't say anything, just stared at me with wide, shocked eyes. I took a shuddering breath, but it did nothing to stop my tears. Every sob wracked my injuries with pain. I clenched and unclenched my hands in an effort to stave off the hurt.

"I ran away because I didn't want you to know the truth," I choked out. "I didn't want you to know what kind of person I am."

Suddenly, I felt a hand on my knee. I looked up to see Riku's deep, aquamarine eyes only inches from my own.

"What kind of person you are?" he repeated. "What do you mean?"

I swallowed hard, the tears forming a painful lump in my throat. "After the funeral, my father told me that I was a worthless, selfish, incompetent insect." New hot tears spilled from my eyes. "He's right. I'm the reason my mother is dead. If it hadn't been for me, she'd still be here."

Riku's expression suddenly hardened. His eyes, steely and fierce, burned into mine. "No, Sora. Stop. Your father is wrong. It's not your fault. It was an accident. You can't blame yourself for this."

"How can I not?" I asked quietly, lowering my eyes miserably. "It should have been me, not her."

Riku didn't say anything. Suddenly, he pulled me forward into a tight hug. I stiffened for a moment in surprise before wrapping my arms around him and sobbing into his shoulder.

We stayed like that for several minutes before I was able to calm down. When I had stopped crying so hard, Riku pushed me out to arm's length.

"Don't think like that, ok? You're here for a reason. You're not worthless. Please Sora, don't keep blaming yourself."

While my heart was flying at the hope of forgiveness that Riku was offering me, my mind wasn't so easily convinced. _Don't kid yourself,_ a voice in my head sneered at me. _You're worthless. Even Riku will realize that eventually._

But even though I knew that those thoughts were true, I was willing to believe Riku for the moment. It was a welcome reprieve from the constant feeling of guilt.

I gave him a small smile. "Thank you, Riku," I whispered. "Thank you."

Riku smiled back reassuringly. "Let's get you home," he said.

Once he had dropped me off at my apartment, I shuffled my way into my room and collapsed onto the bed. I never knew that Riku was so concerned for me. I always thought he viewed me as a bit of a nuisance, and there he was comforting me while I cried like a two year old. And he knew my biggest secret. It felt wonderful to have someone else to confide in, but I hoped he wouldn't treat me any differently now that he knew.

I looked over at my phone and saw that there was a message. Wondering who on earth would have called me, I played it back.

"Hey, it's Axel, remember me? Riku's stepsister at the café gave me your number. We're all getting together Friday night at Roxas'. You should come. Give me or him a call to RSVP or whatever. Bye!"

I sat there, staring at the phone, for at least ten minutes. They wanted to spend time with me? It baffled me that people actually wanted to be friends with someone like me. For a second, Riku's warning to stay away from Axel and Roxas flashed through my mind. But I shook it off, grabbed my phone, and called Axel to tell him I'd be there Friday night.


	5. Scars

At eight o'clock Friday night, I found myself standing nervously in front of Roxas' apartment. The building in which he lived was very upscale and sophisticated, and was in the very heart of the richest area of the city. The hallways were thickly carpeted, and the clean white walls had beautiful paintings hanging every few feet. I hesitated before knocking on the door to Roxas' apartment.

_What am I even doing here?_ I asked myself. _I barely even know these people._

But before I could turn around and go back home, the door swung open, revealing a smiling Axel. The redhead, dressed in faded jeans and a T-shirt, looked starkly different then the suit-clad man I had met several days before. He seemed much more relaxed and carefree then when he was in the office.

"Sora, hey! Glad you could make it," Axel said, ushering me inside. "Everyone's in the living room."

The man led me down a small hallway and into the living room. A large TV sat on a table across the way, and there were two broad, comfortable-looking couches on either side. A coffee table piled high with soda and snacks occupied the middle of the room.

There were four other people in the living room. I recognized Roxas, who was sprawled on one of the couches, but he was the only one. A younger-looking man with short blonde hair was sitting on the floor playing videogames against a pretty brunette girl. The final person, a chubby man with dark hair, was selecting a soda from the table. I realized with a sinking feeling that Riku wasn't there.

"Hey everyone, this is Sora," Axel introduced me. "He's a new friend of ours."

"Um, hi," I mumbled, suddenly shy.

"Hi," the blonde man said with a cheerful wave. "I'm Hayner, and these two are Olette and Pence."

After the introductions were done, Axel steered me to the couch and handed me a soda. He then crossed the room and went to sit next to Roxas, but the gangly man took up the entire couch. Axel tried to push his friend's feet to the side, but Roxas stubbornly tried to keep control of the couch.

With an exasperated sigh, Axel wrapped his arms around Roxas' legs and, with one swift motion, hauled him off of the couch. Roxas landed heavily on the floor with a cry of protest. He scrambled to his feet only to see Axel lying across the couch, exactly as he had been seconds before.

Olette, Hayner, and Pence burst out laughing, and I tried vainly to hold back my own laughter. Roxas glared death at Axel.

"Are you going to get up?" he asked threateningly.

Axel stretched. "Nope," he said cheerily.

"Fine then." Without warning, Roxas jumped and sat heavily on Axel's stomach. The tall redhead tried desperately to get Roxas off of himself, but when that failed he sat back with a resigned sigh.

"I can't breathe, you know," he commented off-handedly.

"Too bad," Roxas replied.

"So, Sora," Olette interrupted, "How did you guys meet?"

"I met them when I went to see my friend, Riku," I replied, my shyness disappearing. "Um, is he coming tonight?"

Axel snorted. "Riku? Yeah, right. He's too good for the likes of us."

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused. Why did everyone dislike Riku so much? He seemed so kind—a little distant, yes, but he had taken very good care of me. "He's always been nice to me."

Roxas rolled his eyes. "Riku's always nice in the beginning. Trust me, kid; don't believe a word that jerk says. He's made his entire life by lying and stabbing people in the back—and if it suits him, he'll do it to you too."

I frowned, completely bewildered. "I don't understand. That just doesn't seem like the Riku I know." Despite the fact that I knew very little about him anyways.

Roxas sighed heavily. "I didn't want to show you this, but I like you and I don't want you getting hurt."

Before I could ask what he meant, Roxas had pulled his shirt off and twisted around so that I could see his pale back. A huge knotted scar stretched from his right shoulder down to his left hip. It stood out painfully white against his skin.

Roxas turned back around and slipped on his shirt. "That's what happens to those foolish enough to trust Riku," he said, his face pained as he recalled the memory. Axel, sensing Roxas' distress, took the blonde man's hand in his and loosely intertwined their fingers. Roxas smiled at the redhead before continuing. "I can't tell you exactly what happened, but just trust me—don't get involved with him. I made that mistake, and I almost died because of it."

I nodded dumbly, the image of that horrible scar still before my eyes. I wanted to know what happened, but it was obvious that Roxas wasn't going to tell me. Why was it that I kept getting more questions than answers?

Before the silence could get awkward, Hayner spoke up. "Hey, Sora, you any good at videogames?"

"Yeah," I said, and was handed a controller.

Several hours later I was walking down the street to my home. The time had passed quickly, and I had had an unexpectedly good time. So good, in fact, that we had all made plans to meet up again the following weekend.

I walked slowly down the street, absently kicking an empty soda can before me. As I walked, I thought. I couldn't get Roxas' scar out of my mind. So, that was why those two hated Riku so much. Whatever had happened, Roxas had been really hurt, and it was Riku's fault.

But what had happened? I sighed, frustrated. _It's pretty stupid to tell someone not to get involved with Riku, but then not explain why, _I thought. And besides, the Riku they were talking about and the Riku I knew just didn't match up. Didn't Kairi say that he was extremely protective of the people he cared about? And I was pretty sure that I fell within that category. Riku would never let anything happen to me, right?

But how much did I really know him? The only times we had talked, it had been about me and my past. Come to think of it, Riku had never told me anything about himself, except that he moved around a lot. That didn't seem very fair. Didn't he trust me?

I moodily kicked the can and watched it spin into the middle of the road. Before I could run out and grab it, a car came screeching by and crushed it beneath its wheels. I stood there for a couple minutes, staring at the remains of my can. Well, that game was over.

I continued walking and reached my little apartment fifteen minutes later. Locking the door behind me, I glanced at the clock. It was eleven at night. I changed into my pajamas—just a pair of sweatpants—and went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I looked at the scars on my arm and shoulder from the accident, and once again I thought of Roxas.

Suddenly, my phone rang. I scrambled out of the bathroom, choking on toothpaste, and snatched up the receiver.

"Hello?" I said, wondering who on earth it could be so late at night.

"Hey Sora, it's Riku."

My heart suddenly sped up. "Riku? Is everything okay? Why are you calling so late at night?"

Riku laughed. "Calm down, Sora. I was just wondering if you wanted to catch a movie, since it's Friday and all."

"A movie?" I repeated. Axel and Roxas' warning flashed through my head. Don't get involved. Roxas' scar. Don't get involved. "Yeah, that'd be great."

Oh, well.

"I'll be there in ten minutes."

"Ok." I hung up the phone and dashed to get dressed. I had barely pulled on my jeans and sweatshirt before Riku was knocking at my door.

"Hey Sora, you ready?" he asked, his aquamarine eyes bright as he smiled softly. My heart sped up, and a blush crept into my cheeks.

"Yeah." I grabbed my wallet and headed out the door behind him, not bothering to lock my apartment. I had nothing worth stealing anyway.

The theater was only a few blocks from my apartment, so we opted to walk. We talked about trivial things—I wasn't really paying too much attention to the conversation. Instead, my mind was on the scar from that morning and the man walking next to me.

I had never really thought about Riku's good looks. Even tonight, in simple black jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, he looked extremely handsome. I blushed again, very self-conscious. Suddenly, all I wanted to do was get to know this silver-haired mystery. I wanted to be his friend, to get close to him. I just hoped he would allow me to do that.

"So, how has your week been?" I asked. "You haven't been to the café in a while."

"I've been busy." Riku glanced over at me and smiled, causing my heart to race again. "Do you enjoy the café?"

"Yeah, a lot." I hopped along the edge of the curb, trying to avoid the rain puddles that had been left behind from that afternoon. As I jumped over a particularly large puddle, my foot came down wrong and I slipped. With a small cry I fell towards the asphalt, but before I could hit it, an arm snaked out and caught me safely.

Riku pulled me back to my feet and steadied me. "Are you always this clumsy?" he joked.

"Yeah, sorry," I laughed. "Come on, we're going to be late."

And my heart nearly stopped because, as we continued walking down the street, Riku never took his arm from around my shoulders.


	6. Two Sides, Same Story

It only took as a few minutes to buy our tickets and food, and soon I found myself sitting next to Riku in the theater. The lights began to dim as the first preview appeared on the screen.

"So, where were you tonight?" Riku asked me in a whisper, leaning over so he could snatch a handful of popcorn from my bag.

"I was at Roxas'," I said before I could stop myself. Oops.

"What!?" Riku exclaimed in surprise and anger. Someone in the row in front of us turned and gave him a dirty look, and Riku lowered his voice again. "Didn't I tell you to stay away from them?"

"Why should I? They're nice people, and they like me," I whisper-argued back.

"They're dangerous. I don't want you around them."

I raised an eyebrow at Riku, trying very hard to keep my voice low. "It's my life, Riku. I can have whatever friends I want, all right?"

Riku opened his mouth to reply, but several people were glaring at us now, and he shut his mouth angrily. I turned to focus on the movie, my stomach churning. Great. Just great. The first time that it was just Riku and me, and I had to screw it up and make him mad.

I was so distracted that I was barely aware of the movie, and jumped in surprise when the lights suddenly came on, signaling the end of the film. I moved to stand up, but Riku put his hand on my arm and made me sit back down. We stayed where we were until the entire theater was empty. Finally, when we were alone, Riku spoke up.

"I'm not trying to control you, Sora. I'm just concerned about your safety. Yes, Axel and Roxas may seem nice, but in the end they'll just worry about themselves."

_Roxas said the exact same thing about you,_ I thought dismally. "Thank you, Riku, but I'm not a kid. I can take care of myself. Don't worry about me, ok?"

Riku sighed heavily. "Are you going to see them again?"

"Yes."

Riku didn't say anything for several minutes. Finally, he stood up and offered me his hand. "Come on; let's go get something to eat."

Confused, but relieved that the conversation was over, I smiled and took his hand. He smiled back and led me out of the theater and out onto the street. It was such a warm, pretty night that I immediately felt my worries melt away. Riku squeezed my hand and pointed down the street.

"Want to go to that Italian place I told you about a while back?" he asked me.

"Sounds great," I replied.

We didn't talk as we walked down the street toward the restaurant, both of us wrapped up in our own thoughts. I smothered the desire to sigh heavily. What was I going to do? On one side I had Roxas and Axel; on the other I had Riku. Both said the other was dangerous. Both said the other was traitorous. Both were my friends. I could keep the two sides from meeting, but I hoped that I'd never have to choose a side. I don't think I could.

The restaurant was nearly empty this late at night, and we got a table with ease. I ordered spaghetti (like I always did,) but Riku just ordered coffee. I noticed that he barely ate, and when he did it was usually no more than a bite or two.

"Are you sure you don't want something to eat?" I asked him when the food came, and pushed my plate towards him. "Coffee isn't that filling."

"It is when you put as much sugar and cream as I do," Riku said, and smiled. "Thanks, but I'm fine."

I shrugged and proceeded in wolfing down my food. Riku watched me eat, one silver eyebrow raised.

"You don't get to eat a lot, do you?" he asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

I blushed, embarrassed. "Not really," I said, toying with my fork. "Most of my paycheck goes to my apartment, and whatever's left I put away in case of an emergency."

Riku shook his head in disbelief. "And it doesn't bother you?"

"What?"

"Living like you do."

I frowned, chewing thoughtfully on a bite of pasta. "I'd never really thought about it," I answered. "It's just the way things are—I might as well accept it."

Riku drained his coffee cup and began to run his finger around the rim. "You know, you could always come live with Kairi and me."

I almost choked on my food. "Oh no, I couldn't do that," I finally managed to stammer out. "I'd be way too much of an intrusion."

"I've already talked to Kairi about it, and she's fine with it. Actually, she's really looking forward to you moving in. She said she'll need the company once I leave."

I opened and closed my mouth in surprise, unsure of what to say. Kairi and I had grown very close over the past couple weeks—we jokingly referred to each other as brother and sister. But to move in? That would mean being around Riku. A lot. And not that that wouldn't be great, but for some reason I just had this feeling that this would have a very bad outcome.

"Please, Sora?" Riku asked me. "I'd just feel a lot safer if you were with us instead of in that apartment by yourself."

That comment made me look at him curiously. "I know the apartment is crappy, but it isn't dangerous. It's not like it's watched or anything, right?"

Riku's eyes widened slightly, like he had just said something he shouldn't. But in an instant the expression was gone, replaced by his usual unreadable look. "Of course it isn't. But please, Sora, move in with us. Do it for Kairi."

I sighed, but inside I was secretly happy about the offer. "All right. But the moment I'm an inconvenience I'm moving back, okay?"

Riku smiled, looking relieved. "Thank you, Sora."

I smiled back and finished off my spaghetti.

A half hour later we were standing in front of my apartment building. "Thanks for the movie and dinner," I said.

"My pleasure," Riku replied. "So, you're moving in Sunday?"

"Yeah. I'll be there before noon."

"I'll see you then, Sora." Riku turned as if to leave, but suddenly leaned down and placed a soft, quick kiss on my lips. Before I could say a word, he was in his car and driving away.

I stood there, frozen in shock, my hand on my lips. He had kissed me. Riku had kissed me. My heart was going crazy, and a warm feeling rose in my chest. I couldn't help but smile.

I didn't stop smiling until I was standing in front of my apartment. I put my hand out to open the door and gasped in shock.

My apartment had been ransacked. The bed was turned over, the mattress ripped apart. The TV was in pieces on the carpet, and my things had been thrown around and searched through. The phone was off the hook, and the only sound was the endless monotony of the dial tone.

My heart nearly stopped, and I fell to my knees in alarm. My eyes fell on a ripped piece of paper a few feet from me. Two words were scrawled across it.

_You're next._

Maybe I'd move in Saturday instead of Sunday.


	7. Insomniac Kisses

I showed up on Kairi and Riku's doorstep early Saturday morning, blaming an ant infestation for the early move. I had decided not to tell them about the ransacking. It would just make them worry about nothing.

Kairi opened the door just seconds after I had knocked, smiling cheerily. "Hi, Sora!" she greeted me. Her violet eyes fell on the backpack that was dangling from my hand. "Is that all you have?"

I smiled sheepishly. "What can I say? I travel light."

Kairi rolled her eyes, but the smile didn't leave her face. "Come on," she said, "I'll show you your room."

"What, you mean I don't have to sleep on the couch any more?" I joked.

Kairi laughed. She led me down a little hallway, past the kitchen, living room, and bathroom. The walls were powder blue, and pictures of Kairi and her family hung everywhere. Glancing at one, I saw that it was an image of Kairi and Riku at the beach. They looked around six years old.

"How old were you and Riku when your parents got married?" I asked.

"I was two, Riku was four. My father died from illness when I was just a baby, and Riku's mother and father divorced right after he was born. My mom and his dad met at work one day, and well, the rest is history."

"Wow," I said, surprised at this insight into their lives. We reached the end of the hall, and Kairi opened a door and ushered me inside.

The bedroom was cozy and warm, with lavender walls and a plush white carpet. The bed was a queen-size, with puffy pillows and a thick white blanket that looked extremely comfortable. A desk, lamp, and clock sat next to the bed. The far wall was made up of a picture window, with a window seat just below it.

"Do you like it?" Kairi asked.

"It's amazing," I said, eyes wide. It was so generous, and so much more than I deserved. "Thank you so much for letting me stay!"

"What are friends for?" Kairi replied, and gave me a hug. "Make yourself comfortable—if you need anything, I'll be in the kitchen making lunch."

"Okay," I said. "Um, Kairi?" I called as she started to leave, "Where's Riku?"

"Still sleeping, the lazy bum," Kairi laughed. "Can't really blame him, though. He didn't come home until three in the morning." She laughed again before walking down the hall.

I frowned, confused. Three in the morning? But I got back to my apartment at one. What was he doing out in the city for two hours? I sighed. I hated not knowing anything about him.

It only took me about five minutes to unpack—all I had were a few shirts and some jeans. Everything else had been destroyed by whoever had broken into my house. After that was done, I hopped onto the window seat and stretched out, my back against the wall. The window had a great view of a little park that was behind the house. As I watched several children playing on the swings, I started thinking. And once I started thinking, I started worrying.

I couldn't help but wonder how Riku would act the next time he saw me. Would he treat me like his boyfriend? Were we even going out? Or would he still be distant, barely talking or noticing me at all?

My head started to hurt from the heavy thoughts, and before long my eyes started to close. Before I knew it, I fell asleep.

"And Kairi calls _me_ a lazy bum."

My eyes snapped open in surprise at hearing Riku's voice. I jumped, overbalanced, and fell off the window seat with a squeak, landing with a heavy thump on the carpeted floor.

"Riku! You scared me!" I exclaimed, trying to sound angry.

I knew I hadn't been convincing the moment he started laughing. "Oh, come on now," he said, and crossed the room to kneel beside me. "Aren't you happy to see me?"

My heart quickened until the speed of it almost hurt. His aquamarine eyes met my sapphire ones, and I started to blush when I noticed how close we were.

Riku smiled slightly before standing up and abruptly walking out the door. "Kairi made lunch," he called before heading into the kitchen.

I stayed frozen on the floor for several more seconds before standing up, bewildered. What was that about? As far as I knew, after you kissed someone you lost the privilege to toy with them.

I sighed heavily before walking into the kitchen, shaking my head to chase out the last bits of sleepiness. Kairi smiled at me as I sat down at the shiny counter, yawning widely. Riku, who had been getting sodas from the fridge, sat down next to me and handed me a Dr. Pepper.

"Thanks," I said, and took a gulp of the sugary drink. Kairi put a plate of cheese enchiladas in front of me.

"Smells great," I said, and took a bite. "Tastes great too!"

Kairi laughed. "See, Riku, Sora has manners! Why can't you be that nice?"

"Because I'm your stepbrother," Riku replied through a mouthful of lunch. "'Nice' wasn't in the job description."

Kairi rolled her eyes and began to eat. I finished in minutes and got up to get some more food.

"Wow, hungry, Sora?" Kairi joked. I blushed.

"Let him eat," Riku suddenly said. "He needs to gain some weight. He's too skinny."

"And he's standing right here," I said, raising an eyebrow. "But he appreciates being talked about like he's not in the room."

Riku smiled at me, and once again my heart did the two-step. I felt my cheeks begin to flush, and I quickly sat down and began to eat, trying desperately to hide my suddenly red complexion. Stupid emotions.

We finished eating, and I helped Kairi wash the few remaining dishes. The rest of the day passed by very uneventfully. After lunch, Riku went for a walk, Kairi took a shower, and I watched TV. We ate dinner, watched a movie, and then Kairi complained of being tired and headed off to bed. It was around ten when I climbed into my own bed, feeling too awkward to be alone with Riku.

As I buried my head in my pillow, my thoughts spun like crazy. What was wrong with me? Every time I was around Riku, I felt so nervous I wanted to faint. I became so worried that I'd say the wrong thing or look stupid that I ended up just not talking at all. This had never happened before. But ever since the night before, my world had been completely turned upside down. All because of that stupid kiss. I was starting to think that it hadn't meant a thing to him, that it had just been a game or spur-of-the-moment thing. That I was just a spur-of-the-moment thing.

I tossed and turned for several hours before finally giving up on the idea of sleeping. Thinking that a glass of water might help, I got up with a groan and walked into the kitchen, only to find someone else already there.

"What are you doing up?" I asked Riku, who was in the process of pouring a bowl of cereal.

"I couldn't sleep," the silver-haired man replied. "What about you?"

"Same thing," I said. I sat down at the counter once again feeling anxious and awkward. Just great.

"Want some?" Riku asked me, motioning to the cereal box in his hand. I nodded, and he grabbed another bowl from the cabinet and put it in front of me.

I filled it to the brim and splashed in milk, nearly causing it to overflow. We ate silently for several minutes before I gathered the courage to say something.

"Listen, Riku," I started, but before I could continue, Riku leaned over the counter and caught me in a kiss.

He pressed his lips softly against mine, waiting for my reaction. When I didn't pull away, he leaned a little farther, deepening the kiss and making me melt into him. My heart felt like it would burst.

After a minute or two, Riku pulled back and looked at me, his eyes serious. "Sora, I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about you. I'm not the best person for you, and sometimes it'll seem like I don't care, but I just want you to know that you are the most important person to me."

"R-Riku," I stammered, overwhelmed by the rush of warmth that came with his words.

"Promise me that you'll always trust me, Sora."

"I trust you, Riku. I do."

Riku kissed me softly again. "I'll never let anything happen to you, ok? That's my promise to you."

At the time, I had no idea the weight that promise would carry. All I cared about was that the man I had feelings for returned that affection.

"Thank you, Riku," I said with a smile. "Thank you."


	8. Blood And Rain

It was Monday night, and we were an hour from closing at the café. Selphie had left a little while before, needing to get home and make dinner before some friends came over. I had just started counting the money in the register when Kairi's cell phone went off.

She went into the back and returned a few moments later, snapping the phone shut. "We have a problem," she said.

"What is it?" I asked, placing some bills back into the register.

"Selphie just called. Her car is broken down, and she needs someone to go pick her up."

"You can go get her," I replied. "I'll close up the café."

"Are you sure?" Kairi asked. "You won't have a ride home."

"I can walk," I said. "Really, it's fine. Go get Selphie."

Kairi smiled. "Thanks, Sora," she said, and gave me a hug before heading out the door. I finished counting out the money and put everything back. The café was nearly empty, with only two or three people sitting around and finishing up their dinners. By the time I was hanging up my apron, the place was completely empty.

I locked the door to the café and began walking toward my new home. I walked slowly, enjoying the warm night. Even though it was only around ten, the streets were nearly void of life. Only a few cars went rolling by, and I saw no one else on the sidewalk with me. Hands in my pockets, I smiled as I thought about Riku. Ever since he had told me his feelings the first night I had moved in, he had treated me like I was his boyfriend—holding my hand, stealing kisses when he passed me in the hall, telling me he cared. Never in a million years did I think I would end up with him, but I was incredibly happy I had.

I had been walking for about five minutes when I heard footsteps behind me. I glanced back and saw two men walking about a hundred feet behind me. They seemed to be deep in conversation, but I noticed that they kept their pace matched with mine. Curious, I began to walk just a little faster. My heart clenched in fear when the men also sped up, not enough to be suspicious, but enough to make me start to worry.

I walked a little farther before casually turning a corner, as if I had meant to go that way all along. I had gone about halfway down the street before looking back.

The men were still following me.

I glanced up at the sky and was surprised to see that it had become filled with clouds in a matter of minutes. Lightning threaded through the thick, gray mass, and thunder began to rumble. I hated summer sometimes—you never knew exactly what the weather would be like.

Fat raindrops began to fall, and despite quickening my pace I was thoroughly drenched within a matter of moments. Desperate to find a way out of the rain, I ducked into an alleyway to my left. There was a doorway about halfway down the alley, with huge crates stacked next to it. I ran to the door and twisted the knob, but it was locked.

The two men's voices were growing louder. Frightened, I dove behind the crates and pulled one in front of me, hoping that I was hidden from sight. I crouched there, shaking, my heart slamming against my ribcage. Several moments later, I saw two shadowy silhouettes pause in front of the alley.

"Where did he go?" I heard one of them ask, not bothering to hide his intentions any more.

"I don't know," the other replied. "Let's check down here."

Oh crap. I pressed myself as far down as I could go, praying fervently to go undiscovered. I watched through a gap in the crates as the two men began searching the alleyway. Both were dressed in trench coats and wide-brimmed hats that completely hid their faces, cloaking them both in shadow. I hadn't recognized either of the voices. Who were they, and what did they want with me?

I tensed as the men came closer, the rain muffling the sound of their boots. I strained to see their faces, but they were too shadowed by the hats. I couldn't even see their eyes.

I held my breath as they walked right past my hiding place and continued down the alley. I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding, relief making my knees shake. They hadn't found me. Maybe if I made a run for it, I could get out of there before they noticed I was gone…

I yelped in fear as I felt a hand close around my ankle. Before I could react, I was dragged out of my hiding place into the alley. I cried out and struggled, but it was no use. Whoever had grabbed me flipped me onto my back and pinned me down with a heavy boot on my chest.

I looked up in fear at my captors. I realized that I hadn't been able to see their faces because they had tied black cloth across them, showing only their eyes. The one pinning me down was slightly more heavyset than his companion, who was standing on the other side of me, arms crossed.

"Wh-who are you?" I choked out, trying to keep my panic out of my voice and failing miserably.

In reply, the man above me pressed his weight down on my chest until I cried out from the pain. I thought my ribs were going to break.

"It doesn't matter who we are," the thinner man said, his cold gaze fixed on me. "But it does matter who you are."

"What?" I gasped.

"Do you know Riku?" the man pressing his boot on me demanded.

Instinctually, I kept my mouth shut. When I didn't answer, the man suddenly slammed all of his weight into my chest. I screamed, feeling at least one of my ribs snap. I punched and clawed at his leg, trying frantically to free myself from the pain.

"Enough," the thinner man ordered his companion. Reluctantly, the man removed his boot from my chest.

I whimpered in pain and curled up, trying to shield myself from further injury. The thin man came and crouched down next to me.

"Do you know Riku?" he asked me again.

Blurry from pain, I felt myself nod weakly. Even though I couldn't see their faces, I knew both men were smiling.

"What are you to him?" the man continued. "A coworker? A friend?" He paused. "Something more, maybe?"

Even though I was in extreme pain, I knew that I shouldn't answer him this time. I couldn't give out any more information about Riku. I couldn't help these people, whoever they were.

The thin man nodded to his companion, who silently walked over. He gazed coldly at me for a moment before suddenly, viciously, kicking me in the stomach.

I screamed again, tears of agony rolling down my face. I tried to turn away, tried to escape, but I was grabbed, dragged back, and kicked several more times, one of them connecting solidly with my cheek.

I lay limp on the dirty ground, coughing weakly as I tried to focus through the pain. Blood, thick and coppery, filled my mouth, and I tried to spit it out, but only succeeded in choking on it. I tried to curl up again, but I couldn't move one of my arms. It was probably broken.

The thinner man kneeled next to me again, bright eyes burning into mine. "I'm going to ask you again," he said slowly. "What are you to Riku?"

"I-I'm…a friend…of someone he…knows," I lied, chest heaving as I tried to catch my breath. "He…doesn't…know me."

The man slapped me, hard enough that my head snapped around and hit the ground. I coughed, blood spattering my clothes.

"Don't lie to me!" the thin man snarled. "We saw you with him! Where is he now!?"

"Go…to…hell," I said thickly.

The man grabbed me by the shirt and punched me repeatedly. Blood gushed from my nose, which had broken by now, and my ribs burst with agony from the sudden movement. I gasped in shock and agony. Unaware of what I was doing, I struggled and hit the man across the face.

It became an all-out lynching. Suddenly, both men were on me, kicking, punching, and cursing. I curled into a ball, hearing more bones snap, feeling blood soak through my clothes. I knew that I was going to die.

Finally, the two men stopped their beating. They stood over me as I lay, choking and shuddering, on the ground. The thin man's companion bent down and stuffed a piece of paper into my pocket.

"A message for Riku," the thin man explained, as if I was lucid enough to know what he was talking about. "Actually, part of the message. You're the other part, to show Riku what we're capable of. Tell him that this is just the beginning. That if he doesn't do as we say, we'll kill you next time."

And then they were gone. I stayed on the ground for what seemed like hours, locked in pain. After a while, I noticed that it had stopped raining.

I couldn't go back to Riku. Those men would follow me and hurt him. I couldn't let them hurt him. I had to go as far away from Riku as possible.

I don't know how I did it—I suspect that I had crawled, since I couldn't feel one of my legs. I wasn't even really aware of where I was going. After at least an hour of dragging myself through a haze of blinding pain, I found myself knocking weakly on Roxas' door.

Axel opened the door, eyes widening in shock when he saw me.

"Oh my God, Sora, what happened!?"

"Axel," I gasped, and collapsed into darkness.


	9. White Lies

The darkness was thick and suffocating, like cotton pressed against my nose and mouth. It weighed me down, clinging to every part of me, crushing against my bruised and battered body. I tried to fight against it, but it was like I was being dragged to the bottom of an icy, numbing ocean. An ocean that was quickly snuffing the life out of me.

Gradually, I became aware of a world outside my night-dark hell. At first, it was just faint voices drifting in and out of hearing. Then, sensation started coming back. The first thing I felt was pain. Everything hurt, a lot. I never knew there were so many kinds of pain. Burning, aching, stinging, stabbing…the varieties were endless. After spending what seemed like years in the delirium of anguish, I began to wish that I was back in my dark ocean. At least it hadn't hurt in there.

At then, almost imperceptibly, I felt a new sensation. One of comfort, and reassurance. One I used to focus on when the other sensations became unbearable. Someone was holding my hand…

I opened my eyes and quickly shut them again when a bright, glaring light pierced my blurry vision. After a few moments, I opened them again.

Instead of the world of darkness I had been sleeping in lately, I was greeted by a world of white. The bed I was in, the sheets that covered me, even the floor and walls were the same painful shade of cheerless white. I shifted slightly to get a better view of where I was and whimpered at the pain that shot through me.

"Sora!"

There was movement to my left, and suddenly my vision was filled with a fiery red. Axel peered intently into my face, concerned filling his emerald eyes.

"Sora, you're awake! How are you feeling?"

I stared at him blankly. "Wh…what?"

He laughed a little, but his serious expression quickly took the place of his mirth. "You're in the hospital, Sora. Do you remember anything that happened?"

I frowned, trying to remember, and winced. Even that move hurt. "I remember walking home, and there were two men…" My eyes widened and full memory came flooding back. Terror gripped me, and the heart monitor I was attached to went crazy. Axel gripped my shoulder comfortingly.

"It's okay, Sora, it's over, you're not in danger any more," he said soothingly. Eventually, I was able to get myself under control. I took a deep breath—or tried to, any way—and concentrated on what had happened. I remembered the note that had been stuffed into my pocket for Riku. Panic threatened to overwhelm me again.

"Where are my clothes?" I asked.

"Destroyed," Axel replied. "They were so torn and covered in blood that they had to be thrown out. I hope you weren't carrying anything important in them."

I tried to hide my sigh of relief. The letter hadn't been found. I had already decided not to tell them—any of them—about what had really happened. I would keep it a secret and deal with it on my own. I wasn't going to let Riku get hurt because of me.

"Sora, what happened to you?" Axel asked me again. "You scared the heck out of me and Roxas when you showed up on our porch all beat up."

"I was mugged," I lied quickly. "I was going home and two men attacked me." Well, it wasn't too much of a stretch. I paused for a moment to see if Axel believed me; he did. "Axel, does Riku know I'm here?" _Please say no, please say no, _I pleaded silently.

"Yeah, he and Roxas are just getting something to eat. Well, actually, Roxas had to drag him out of here and make him get food. He hasn't left your side since you were admitted."

Crap. The last thing I had wanted was for Riku to get involved, and he had. This sucked. I didn't want to cause him any kind of trouble, and now I had probably made him worry himself sick.

"Wait," I said as a thought came to me, "Don't you guys hate each other?"

Axel chuckled grimly. "It's surprising how concern for someone can make people put aside their differences, huh? Cliché but true. We still don't like each other, but you come first."

I blushed, unsure of what to say. Just then, a familiar silver-haired man came walking in.

"Sora!" Riku cried, and came running over to the side of my bed. He took one of my hands in his, relief and worry crossing his face. Axel smiled at me before surreptitiously making his way out of the room, leaving us alone.

"Sora, thank God you're awake," Riku said, running a thumb over the back of my hand. So, he had been the one holding my hand. I should have known.

My heart swelled with warmth as I studied Riku's handsome face. There were dark circles under his eyes from lack of sleep, and his skin was pale and drawn from worry, but he had never looked more beautiful to me. Just seeing him made my entire ordeal worth it.

"Hi, Riku," I said with a smile. "I missed you."

Riku smiled back. "I missed you, too." He placed a soft kiss on my hand, causing me to blush. "You have no idea how worried I've been. What happened to you? All I got was a call from Axel saying that he and Roxas were taking you to the hospital."

"I was mugged," I said quietly. Even though I was doing it for his own good, it killed me to lie to him. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" Riku echoed. "For what?"

"For letting this happen, and for making you worry. It's my fault."

Anger crossed Riku's face, and I wondered if I'd said the wrong thing. Apparently, I had.

"Why do you always blame yourself?" Riku demanded, suddenly annoyed. "Why do you always have to blame yourself? You almost died, Sora. You've been unconscious for a week and a half. Do you really think that the first thing I want to hear from you is 'I'm sorry?'"

"I-m--" I started again, but quickly closed my mouth. Tears stung the back of my eyes. _Don't be a child,_ I thought fiercely.

Riku took one look at my expression and his anger melted away. Distressed, he kissed my hand again. "Sora, I'm sorry," he said softly. "I'm so sorry. I'm not angry at you, I promise." He sighed heavily. "I was just so scared that I was going to lose you. There were a couple times where you…you just stopped breathing. I'll never forget how worried I was."

Hating to see Riku so sad, I moved to squeeze his hand, and gasped at the pain. For the first time I realized just how bandaged up I was.

"What happened to me?" I asked Riku. "Just how bad was I?"

"A broken arm, a broken leg, four broken ribs, a punctured lung, broken nose, you fractured part of your skull…" Riku's voice broke. "You had to have a couple blood transfusions as well. They told me that you probably weren't going to make it. And at first, I thought you weren't going to."

I motioned with my finger for Riku to come closer. He complied, and I kissed him softly on the lips. "And leave you here all alone?" I asked. "Of course not. Life would be too boring without me."

Riku smiled and ran a thumb lightly over the stitches in my cheek. "If I ever find who did this to you, I'll make sure that they pay."

I laughed nervously. "Well, for their sakes, I hope you never do."

Suddenly, I felt extremely tired. I tried to smother my yawn, but Riku noticed. He ran a hand through my hair. "You should go to sleep. It's been a hard time for you."

"But I don't want to," I whined, and yawned again. "I want to stay with you."

"I'll be here when you wake up again," he said. "I promise."

I nodded, already half asleep. Riku kissed me as my eyes slid shut.

"Riku?" I mumbled, wanting to say it before I fell asleep.

"Yes, Sora?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too. Now go to sleep."

The last thing I was aware of was Riku's hand in mine.


	10. Watch Me Fall To Pieces

The following weeks of recovery were some of the most painful memories I have. After three weeks in the hospital they allowed me to go home, but I still had months of physical therapy ahead of me. I was in constant pain and so hazy with drugs that half the time I had no idea who or where I was. But through it all, Kairi, Riku, Axel, and Roxas were there to take care of me. I had never felt so loved in my entire life.

One day, several months after I had been attacked, I woke up to find myself alone in my room. This had never happened before—either Riku or Kairi (though it was usually Riku) would sleep on the window seat in case I needed anything during the night. A sense of unease settled over me, and I tried to sit up further in my bed. The heavy plaster of my casts weighed me down, however, and I soon gave up with a sigh.

Where had everybody gone? Immediately, the image of my two attackers rose to the surface. I struggled to keep down the panic that surged unbidden in my chest. I hadn't seen either of them since that night, but what if they had discovered where I lived? If they had, that would mean that they'd find Riku.

"Riku? Riku!" I called, the fright making my voice break. There was silence for a few moments, and then Riku's silver head poked around the door of my room.

"What's wrong, Sora? Is everything ok?" he asked, worry in his expression.

Relief flooded me, and I smiled. "I just didn't know where you were," I said, feeling a little foolish.

Riku smiled back at me. "I'll be back here in a moment," he said. With that, he disappeared aback into the house.

I settled back on my bed, a smile hovering around my lips. Riku had been nothing but wonderful to me ever since I had gotten back home. He seemed so different from the cold, detached man I had first met in the café. No, the Riku I knew was kind, warm, and protective. In other words, he was perfect.

Just then, the man of my musings came walking back into my room, carrying my breakfast on a tray. He helped me sit upright enough so that I could eat comfortably. While I ate, he sat on the edge of my bed and began nervously playing with his hands.

"Is everything okay, Riku?" I asked him, curious. He never acted like this. Ever.

He didn't answer me for a moment, instead taking one of my hands and running his thumb over my knuckles. I dropped my fork and took his hands in mine, gazing into his eyes.

"Riku, tell me what's going on," I said quietly.

"…You remember your old apartment, right?" he finally asked me.

"Yeah, of course I do," I replied, wondering what this could possibly be about.

"Someone burned it down, Sora," Riku said. "Just your room. The police said that it was soaked with gasoline."

"What?" I exclaimed, my mind reeling. My apartment had been burned down? What the heck was going on?

"Sora, the police are starting to think that your mugging wasn't just a random incident. They think that whoever did that to you might be behind your apartment fire as well. You're being followed, Sora."

I opened and closed my mouth several times, unable to find any words. Those men had burned down my apartment?

"Do you know anyone who might want to hurt you?" Riku asked me, green eyes intense. I could tell that he was trying to be calm and collected for my sake.

"N-no," I stammered. _They want to hurt you._

Riku carefully gathered me into a reassuring hug, mindful of my casts and stitches. "Don't worry, Sora," he whispered fiercely into my ear. "I promise that I won't let them hurt you. I said before that I would protect you, and I will. I love you."

"I love you too," I replied, and wrapped my unbroken arm around my boyfriend. Inside, though, I was falling apart.

If the men had been as bold as to blatantly burn down my old home, that meant they were done with playing games. They knew that I hadn't given Riku the note. If I had, he would be dead by now. And they knew that I didn't live at my old apartment anymore—of that I was certain. But they had burned it down as a warning, as a way of letting me know that they were still on my trail. What would happen if they found me here, with their target?

I shivered, not wanting to follow that train of thought. Riku, feeling me tremble, began to rub his hand up and down my back. I buried my face in the crook of his neck, fighting back tears. No matter what, I couldn't let them get to Riku.

Two weeks later I had my casts removed. It was hard for me to walk at first, but after a little while I was up and back to normal. A week after that, I went back to work. Riku didn't want me to overexert myself, but I was so tired of lying around that I had to do something.

Riku dropped me off at the café after taking me to breakfast. "Don't work too hard," he said, and kissed me on the cheek. "If you feel tired, take a break."

"Yes, mother," I said with a grin as I stepped out of the car. Riku rolled his eyes playfully before waving goodbye and driving to his own work.

I walked inside, automatically going behind the counter and grabbing my apron. Selphie came out from the back, a smile on her cheerful face.

"Sora! It's so great to see you back!" she exclaimed, and gave me a hug. "How are you feeling?"

"Just great," I replied. "How have things been here?"

"Busy," Selphie laughed.

She went into the back to continue cooking, and I took over the cash register. The morning passed rather uneventfully, with only a few customers coming in. I spent the majority of my time cleaning the tables and staring out the window.

It was around two o'clock, and I had switched places with Kairi so that she was on the floor now. I was standing at the sink, elbow-deep in suds and dirty dishes. My redheaded housemate came up behind me and tapped me on the shoulder.

"Sora, there's a couple guys here that are asking for you," she said. "They look kinda shady. Do you want me to tell them you aren't here?"

I turned around and took a quick glance outside, my heart stopping. Two men were standing impatiently at the counter, dressed in trench coats and hats pulled down low so that their faces were hidden. I still recognized them, however—they were the men who were after Riku.

Kairi looked at me in concern. "Sora, are you okay?"

"Tell them that you made a mistake—that I don't work here. Even better, say you don't even know where I am. I-I have to get out of here," I said, trying very hard to keep my voice steady.

Kairi nodded. "Once you're gone I'll call the cops."

"No, just turn them away," I said. "Please?"

"Fine." Kairi spun me around and pushed me in the direction of the back of the kitchen. "Take the back door and get home as fast as possible."

"Thank you," I said, and dashed towards the back while Kairi went back out to the front to drive the men off.

I jerked the door open and ran outside, closing it as silently as possible behind me. Once outside, I started running down the alleyway and toward the street that led to my home. I hadn't gotten very far, however, before I couldn't take another step. I hadn't healed as completely as I thought I had.

I pressed my back against a wall and took deep breaths, trying to figure out the situation.

The men had found my work. This was not good. If they had found the café, how much longer would it be until they found my home? How much longer until they found Riku? How much longer until they killed him?

I knew what I had to do. I knew what was necessary in order to keep my love alive, but it was going to kill me to do it.

Still, my mind was made up. I started walking toward the nearest payphone, heart aching. I stood with the phone pressed against my ear for at least ten minutes before gathering the courage to dig into my pocket and slide the quarters into the phone. It took me even longer to punch in Riku's cell phone number.

_Please don't pick up,_ I prayed, _don't pick up, don't pick up, don't—_

"Hello?" Riku's voice came over the phone, and I almost hung up right there.

"Riku?" I said, already choking on tears.

"What is it, Sora? Are you all right?"

"Riku, I…I'm…"

"Sora, baby, please talk to me. What's going on?"

"I'm leaving you, Riku," I blurted out, and started crying. There was shocked silence on Riku's end for a very long time.

"Wh-what?" he finally asked.

"It's over, Riku." I choked on the words I was about to say next, but I knew that I had to do it. I had to make Riku hate me enough that he would stay as far away from me as possible. Only then would he be safe. "I don't love you anymore."

"You don't mean that." Riku's voice was as strangled with tears as mine was, and I nearly agreed with him right there. I almost said that I did love him, that I was lying, that no one was more important than him.

Almost.

"I'm afraid that I do."

"What did I do, Sora? Whatever it was, I'm sorry! Please don't do this. Please."

I knew then what I had to say to make him hate me completely. It was going to hurt him beyond belief, but I was doing it because I loved him.

"There's someone else, Riku. I'm in love with someone else. And besides, you were just a temporary thing anyway. We both knew that you were only here for business, and I would have ended it when it was time for you to move. But I found someone better, so I might as well do this now."

There was silence. When Riku spoke again, there was fury and anguish in his voice. "What are you saying? That you used me?"

I swallowed hard, trying to sound callous. "Why else would I have been with you?"

"You bastard." I could hear the tears in his voice. "Go to hell."

I didn't say anything, just hung up the phone. I stood there for a moment before completely breaking down, collapsing on the ground and sobbing so much I couldn't breathe. What had I done? I wanted to call him back right then and tell him everything, but I knew I couldn't. I had to keep those men away from him, and this had been the only way to do it.

After crying for what seemed like hours, I searched my pockets and pulled some quarters to pay the phone. I quickly dialed Roxas' and Axel's number, sniffling.

"Yo, this is Axel."

"Hi, Axel, it's Sora. Can I spend the night at your house?"

"Are you crying? What's wrong?" Axel demanded, concern and worry in his voice.

"I just…I need a place to stay. Could I?"

"Of course you can, Sora, but won't Riku be worried about where you are?"

I took a deep, shaky breath. "We broke up. He hates me now. I don't think he'll ever care where I am again."

"I'm so sorry," Axel said. "Stupid Riku. Of course you can stay over here. Stay for as long as you need. Do you need anything else?"

"No, that's okay. I'll be over in a few minutes." I tried to sound happy, but I failed miserably. "Thanks, Axel."

"No problem, kid. Will you be okay?"

"Sure I will. See you in a bit." I hung up and angrily wiped at my tears, Riku's voice still ringing in my head.

I turned and began the long walk to Axel and Roxas', wondering if I would ever be okay again.


	11. Revenge Can Be Suicide

The door was flung open the moment I knocked on the rough wood. Axel ushered me inside, concern all over his features. He led me to the couch and pressed a cold soda into my hands, which I took numbly.

"Roxas is at work," he said. "He'll be home as soon as he can. How are you doing?"

"I'm fine," I replied faintly. My argument with Riku still echoed through my head, causing tears to sting at the back of my eyes. I couldn't believe it was over. I had never loved anyone as much as I had loved him, and now he was gone. My heart was still breaking.

Axel sat down next to me and put an arm around my shoulder in comfort. We sat like that for what seemed like hours, the redhead unsure of what to say and me with nothing to say. I heard the door open softly, and for a wild second I thought it was Riku walking into the room. The remains of my heart dropped to the floor when Roxas walked into the room.

"Hi honey, hi Sora," the blonde man said as he stood in front of us. "How are you feeling?"

"Just great," I said, and I smiled in what I hoped was a convincing way. "How was work?"

"Can't complain," he replied. "I'm going to go make dinner for us. Is there anything you'd like to eat?"

"Actually, can I have some time alone?" I asked. "I just…I have to think about this."

Axel nodded, stood up, and followed his boyfriend into the kitchen. I stayed frozen on the couch, absently rubbing my thumb across the slick aluminum of the soda can in my hands. I contemplated just running out of the room and going to Riku's, begging for him to forgive me and to take me back. I was halfway off the couch before the image of the two cloaked men flashed across my mind. With a sigh I sank back down, defeated.

After crying for a few minutes and silently shouting at God that this wasn't fair at all, I got up and walked into the kitchen, where Axel and Roxas were busy making dinner. As I watched, Roxas walked behind Axel and hugged him tightly around his waist and planted a sweet kiss on his fiery hair. It made my heart ache, and I had to stop myself from breaking into tears again. _That should be me and Riku,_ I thought miserably.

I walked into the kitchen, and Roxas quickly untangled himself from Axel, obviously not wanting to distress me with their signs of affection. I sat down at the counter, smiling.

"It's okay, you guys, you don't have to stop because of me."

Axel placed a plate piled high with rice and stir fry in front me. "You can sleep in the guest room," he told me as I thanked him for the food. "You can stay for as long as you'd like—you're always welcome here."

"Thank you," I whispered, and dug my fork into the food before me. As I lifted the utensil to my mouth, however, my stomach clenched painfully. I slowly placed the fork back on the plate and pushed it away from me. Roxas looked at me curiously.

"I…I'm not hungry. I'm sorry." Axel squeezed my shoulder reassuringly and silently placed my plate in the fridge.

"Don't worry about it. It'll be here for you whenever you're ready, all right?" he said. I looked up at him miserably, and the look of sympathy and friendly affection in his eyes was so sincere that I wanted to break down right there. I didn't deserve friends as kind and caring as Axel and Roxas, especially after what I did to Riku. I didn't deserve anything other than death.

"Would it be all right if I took a shower?" I asked. Roxas nodded and led me to the bathroom.

"I'll bring you some clothes when you're finished. Axel and I will be in the living room," the blonde said.

I thanked him and closed the door behind me. Stripping down, I proceeded to take a scalding shower, barely feeling the burning water as it hit my skin. I felt numb, both inside and out. As I stood with my head bowed, the water pounding on the base of my neck, I came to a realization that I should have thought of a long time ago. It was so simple, and so easy; I felt foolish for not thinking of it before.

Shutting off the water, I dried off and dressed in the clothing that Roxas had left outside the door. With a new resolve, I walked down the hall and into the living room, where Axel and Roxas were lying on the couch and watching a movie.

"Hey Roxas, can I talk to you for a moment?" I asked.

Roxas cocked his head curiously at me but didn't say anything. He stood up and followed me into the guest bedroom. Once he had sat down on the bed, I closed the door and stood there, facing him.

"How did you get that scar on your back?" I asked abruptly.

A look of shock and surprise flashed across Roxas' face. He crossed his arms, suddenly defensive. "Why do you want to--" he began to ask, but I cut him off.

"Please, Roxas, this is important. Tell me how you got your scar."

Roxas didn't reply, and for a second I thought he wasn't going to answer me. Finally, he sighed, running a hand through his spiky hair.

"Fine, I'll tell you, but it isn't a pleasant story. You're not even supposed to know what I'm about to say." He sighed again in defeat before continuing. "Do you know what Axel, Riku, and I do for a living?"

I shook my head. "Riku never told me."

"He never told you because no one is allowed to know what our job is. I know it looks like we just have regular nine to five jobs, but that's not true." Roxas ran his hand through his hair again. "We…work…for a multi-million dollar company that specializes in giving loans to smaller companies. If someone has a new business or a struggling one and they need cash fast, they come to us. But sometimes, they can't pay back what they borrowed from us. That's where we come in."

Dread settled in my stomach. "What do you mean?"

"I _mean_ that, when a business didn't pay the company back by deadline, then Axel, Riku, me, or one of the others would go and…persuade them to do so."

I stared at him in horror. "You're assassins?"

"No, more like…tax collectors. Very rarely do we kill a client. We just…rough them up a little." Roxas shrugged, clearly not bothered by his profession. I, however, had a huge problem with it. I bit my tongue, though, and let Roxas continue with his story.

"Two years ago, Riku was a permanent employee for the company, and he and I were partners." Roxas blushed, casting his gaze to the floor. "We were also, um, boyfriends. One day we were called out for assignment, but I wasn't feeling well, so Riku volunteered to go by himself. It was a simple job, so I agreed. When he came back, however, something had changed. He wasn't talking as much, and he was strangely distant towards me. He refused to tell me what had happened during that assignment, but he became extremely paranoid and was always looking over his shoulder when we would go out. He also would never let me go out alone. It was all really weird.

'Then the phone calls started. At first, when I picked up the phone there would be no one on the other end—they'd hang up a second after I said hello. After about a week of this Riku wouldn't let me answer the phone. He'd either pick it up himself or let it go straight to the machine. And this whole time, he had slowly stopped talking to me or being seen with me. It was like he was removing himself from my life.

"And then, we went on one assignment at the outskirts of the city. Riku had received the details of the assignment, and he didn't tell me where we were going. We arrived at this old school around midnight, but it seemed odd to me that we were the only two there. I had been walking toward the school building, but I could tell that Riku had stopped walking behind me. I was about to turn to ask him what he was doing when my back just exploded in pain. Riku had slashed me across the back with the knife he always carried around. I remember laying face down in the dirt, my blood soaking through my clothes, and just looking up at him. He sheathed his knife, met my eyes with his and said, 'You've become too much of a liability to me.' And then he just walked away and left me there to die."

Roxas paused, and I stared at him in shock, my mind processing what I had just been told. "How did you survive?" I finally asked him. He smiled wryly.

"Axel found me. He was a new employee at the company and had been dispatched to find me when I didn't show up for work that morning. He took me to the hospital and took care of me until I had healed. By then, Riku had been relocated to another city, and Axel became my new partner. And, well--" he shrugged again "—you know what happened next. Sometimes Riku comes back, but he only stays for a month or two before leaving again. He never told me why he tried to kill me. Honestly, the first time he saw me again he was shocked I was still alive. Needless to say, Axel hates him."

I sank to the floor, overwhelmed. They were mercenaries. Riku had tried to kill Roxas. But why? My mind whirled around and around, and suddenly something clicked. I looked up at Roxas, and as I spoke the words I knew what I said was the truth.

"He wasn't trying to kill you, Roxas. He was trying to protect you."

Roxas stared at me, incredulous. "What?"

But I had jumped to my feet and began pacing, the gears in my mind spinning at a frightening pace. "He did what I'm doing right now. Something happened at that assignment, and when it did I have a feeling that you were being threatened. Riku needed to get you away from him, for your safety. And how else but to make you hate him? So he attacked you, and moved away, and probably just prayed that whoever was after him would leave you alone now."

Roxas gaped at me. "Sora, what are you talking about? You're not making any sense."

I whirled to face him, eyes bright. "Roxas, I know what he did because I'm doing it right now." I pointed to the scar right below my eye, from where the cloaked man's boot had connected with my cheek. "You remember the night I was attacked, right?"

"I'll never forget it," Roxas said. "But you were mugged."

"No, I wasn't. I was attacked and beat by two men who interrogated me about Riku. They wanted to know where he was and how I knew him. They also destroyed my apartment and followed me to work." Roxas opened his mouth in astonishment, but I plowed on. "I knew that if I stayed around Riku any longer, I would eventually lead them to him. I couldn't let that happen, so I did to him what he did to you—I made him hate me."

"How?" Roxas stammered, as overwhelmed as I had been a minute before.

I took a deep breath—it still hurt to think about it. "I told him that I didn't love him any more, that he was just a temporary and that I had fallen for someone else. It's not true, but it worked. He hates me, but that means he'll stay away from me. And that's what I wanted."

Roxas shook his head in distress. "Oh my God. I can't believe this."

I nodded firmly, confident in my hypothesis. "And you know what? I'll bet you anything that the people Riku was trying to protect you from are the ones that are following me now."

I stood directly in front of Roxas and kneeled so that I was eye level with him. "Roxas, I need you to promise to do what I'm about to ask you."

Roxas opened his mouth to protest, but one look at my determined expression made him change his mind. He nodded, resigned.

"What do you want?"

"I want a gun and directions to that school."

Roxas stared at me. "What are you planning to do?"

"If I stay here, those men will find me and hurt you. I can't let that happen. I have a feeling that they'll be there—it's just a hunch, but I know I'm right." I took a deep breath. "I love Riku. I want to be with him. I can't while those men are alive. So I'm going to find them, and fight them…or die trying. I'm going to save Riku. So please, I know you have a gun. I need it. Now."

Roxas stayed frozen on the bed. After a minute or two, he stood up and walked out of the room, coming back with something wrapped in a towel. He unwrapped it and gave it to me. It was a handgun, and the metal was icy against my skin.

"The school is on Montgomery Street, five miles from here."

"Thank you." I decided to go out the window, so as not to alert Axel, but paused before leaving. "If I'm not back by tomorrow morning, then will you please explain everything to Riku? Tell him I'm sorry, and that I love him."

"I will."

I didn't look back, just jumped out the window and began the long walk to Montgomery Street, the weight of the handgun heavy in my jacket.


	12. Given Up

It started to rain as I walked down the empty street, and within moments I was soaked. The drops were icy and stung as they struck my skin, but I didn't stop. I had to do this, had to complete what I had started. I fingered the gun in my jacket, steeling my resolve as I neared the school. Honestly, I had no idea if the men would be there or not, but it was a hunch I had a strong feeling about. Something told me that I would find them there, and I needed to trust my instincts.

Eventually the school came into view, and I sped up, determined to end this as soon as I could. The rain was falling even harder now, and I felt welts rising where the needle drops slashed against my bare skin. I bowed my head, my hair plastered against my cheeks. It seemed so clichéd to me that it was raining. In any movie, when the good guy died, it rained. This wasn't too good a sign, in my opinion. I was expecting a bullet in my back at any moment.

I climbed the chain-link fence bordering the school and hopped over, my feet thudding loudly onto the ground below. I was on a soccer field that was devoid of any grass. The rain had churned the dirt into a sludgy mud, and soon my shoes and the bottom of my jeans were coated in the thick, gritty substance. I slowed my pace, unsure of where to go. What if they weren't even here? Where would I go now?

The razor click of someone removing the safety from a gun answered my question. I felt the freezing barrel placed against the base of my neck, but I didn't jump. I had been expecting this, after all.

"Congratulations, you found us. And I thought we were going to have to come hunt you down."

"I had a feeling you'd be here," I said, slowly slipping my hand into my jacket. My fingertips had barely brushed the metal of my own gun before the pressure of the gun muzzle increased ever so slightly. I removed my hand from my jacket and let it dangle by my side.

"Don't try any tricks with us, you hear me?" The muzzle pressed even harder against my wet skin. "You'll be dead before you get your finger on the trigger."

A figure came toward me through the pounding rain; I recognized the thick-set man that had beaten me. He stopped a few feet in front of me, eyes cold and glittering above the cloth that covered his face. I gazed steadily back at him, no trace of fear in my expression. I had made my decision a long time ago, and nothing would frighten me now.

The man behind me jabbed at my neck with his gun. "Get on your knees," he ordered. I complied without a word, the freezing mud quickly soaking through the knees of my jeans. "Now, tell me. Who told you that we would be here?"

"Roxas did," I replied. "Remember him? You were planning on using him as a threat to Riku. Now you tell me—is it humiliating to fail at blackmailing Riku _twice_?"

The man in front of me kicked me suddenly and viciously in the face. I hit the ground hard, my cheek pressed into the chilling mud. Rain still pounded down around us, the sharp drops against my face keeping me conscious. The thinner man behind me grabbed me by my collar and yanked me up so that I was halfway off the ground.

"You little bastard!" he snarled. "We were going to kill you quickly, but you've changed that plan."

The man in front of me punched me one, twice, three times in quick succession. My head lolled limply, blood pouring in a thick stream from my mouth to the ground like syrup. I managed to smile weakly; I was numb inside, and there was not a trace of emotion in me. I had lost my mom. I had lost Riku, the one person I lived for. I had lost every friend and family member I had. I realized at that moment that I had not come to the playground to kill these men; I had not come to try and salvage what future I had left.

I had come here to die.

Somewhere deep inside, I had known that I could never beat these men. Hell, I didn't even know how to properly use a gun. But by ending it here, by letting these men win, I was finding closure on a life that was no longer worth living. As corny and cliché as it was, I couldn't live without love, and that was what I had lost. And so, I couldn't keep doing this. I was ready to go.

The man behind me let go of my shirt, and I rolled onto my back with difficulty. "Is this how you get your kicks?" I laughed, blood spraying from my lips as I coughed violently. "Beating up defenseless people?"

A shot cracked through the air as the thin man fired his gun, and for a moment I was certain that I was dead. He hadn't aimed at me, however—the bullet buried itself in the mud several feet to my side. He came to stand over me, dark eyes cold as stone.

"I will take great pleasure in watching you die," he hissed.

I had to stop myself from laughing. He sounded like he was straight from an old movie.

"Just get it over with already," I said. "I'm getting bored."

The man cocked his gun and aimed the muzzle just inches over my heart. It seemed like slow motion as his finger squeezed the trigger, and I closed my eyes, waiting to die.

Three things happened all at once. There was a shout from behind us as someone came racing toward us. Caught off guard, the man jerked his head around in surprise and fired his gun. The bullet tore into my arm, but it wasn't half as bad as it could have been. And I, taking the opportunity at the men's surprise, rolled onto my stomach, whipped out my gun, and fired blindly. My bullet hit the heavy-set man in the leg, and he dropped to the ground with a groan.

I jumped to my feet, blood running in ribbons down my shaking arm. I spun to face the thin man, but he had forgotten I even existed. His gaze was fixed on the man that stood about twenty feet away, the sheets of rain obscuring his face. But even though I couldn't see him, I knew in my heart who had come.

"Leon, Cloud," Riku said, his familiar, cold, detached voice sending shivers of happiness down my spine. "How nice to see you again."


	13. Just Stood There Watching

Nobody moved. The silence stretched for several tense moments, broken only by the sound of the rain as it pounded down around us. I swayed slightly, clutching my arm as blood continued to drip from my fingers to the muddy ground.

"Riku." The thin man slowly brought his gun around and leveled it at the silver-haired man. With his other arm, he removed his hat and cloth with one smooth motion. Long brown hair fell down around his shoulders, and I felt a pang of sympathy at the expression of pain on his intense features. There was a look of desperation in his broken blue eyes.

"Leon," Riku replied, as casually as if they had just run into each other at a coffee shop after years of no contact. "I had a feeling you were behind this."

I heard a grunt of pain behind me. Turning my head slightly, I glanced back to see that the other man had struggled to his feet and removed his disguise as well. Spiky blonde hair framed his rugged, hard face, and his eyes were flinty and cold. My attention swung back to the other two when Leon began to speak.

"I was beginning to think that I'd never get to you," he said grimly, aiming the gun at Riku's head. "After you took care of that blonde for us, I was worried we'd lost our chance for revenge."

He placed his finger over the trigger, and I made a strangled sound in my throat and took a step toward him in fear. Leon froze before turning so that he was facing halfway towards me. Slowly, he brought his arm around and leveled the gun at me.

"An eye for an eye, right, Riku?" he challenged, and I tensed as the gun aimed at my heart. "It's time you felt the pain you inflicted on us!"

For a wild moment I was sure Riku would protest, would fight for my life like I had for his. But then I remembered our last conversation and the things I had said to him. Through the rain, I could see the coldness of his eyes, and I knew that I had destroyed whatever love he had had for me. I took a deep breath as I felt the last scraps of my heart get crushed underfoot.

"You can just kill me," I said, and Leon jerked his head around to look at me in surprise. "I told you before—I don't mean anything to him. Whatever revenge you wanted won't work. He doesn't care about me."

"Is that so?" Not lowering his gun, he walked towards me. I heard Cloud coming up behind me, but I didn't move. Leon glanced back at Riku, who hadn't moved an inch from his place. "Does he mean anything to you?"

"No."

Even though I had convinced myself already that he didn't care, it still hurt to hear it confirmed by Riku himself. I bowed my head in despair as I felt Cloud's iron hands grip me by the shoulders. He jerked my arms behind me, and I cried out in pain as he closed his fist around my wound.

"Then this won't bother you," Leon said. He took the butt of his gun and struck me across the jaw. This was getting really, really old. Was beating me up the only thing they could do?

Cloud dropped me onto the ground, and before I could react, Leon shot me. The bullet buried itself in my other arm, and I screamed as the pain rocked me. I tried to crawl away, struggling to drag myself through the mud and rain, when Cloud picked up my discarded gun and shot me again, this time in the leg like I had done to him.

It was at that moment I realized they were going to torture me until I was dead. I had expected a quick death, a bullet to the head; now I knew that death was going to be many long, painful minutes away. I tried to crawl faster, the click of a readying gun sending terror through my veins.

"Riku!" I shrieked, hysterical with panic. "Riku, help me! Help me!"

He didn't move. My silver-haired angel, my love and my soul, just stood there impassively as they shot me again through my other leg. I writhed on the ground in agony, spattered with my own blood, yelling and sobbing and choking on tears and mud, and he didn't do anything. His aquamarine eyes were detached as he watched my shattered body twist on the rain soaked ground, as if I was nothing but a worm about to be stepped on.

Another bullet tore into my shoulder, and my body arched upwards in convulsions of pain. I collapsed back into the mud, instinctually knowing that I was a minute or two away from bleeding to death. I went completely limp, my eyes sliding halfway closed as I dimly watched the now dark, blurry forms of Leon and Cloud come to stand over my body. I didn't react as I heard them ready their guns. It would be over soon.

My mind flew back to the night I had found my apartment destroyed, to the beating in the alley, to the sight of these men standing in the café. I relived every moment of pain, indecision, and worry. I thought of the nightmares I had of Riku dying, of the sacrifices I had made to keep him safe and alive. And I thought of now, how I had fought to keep him unharmed, and how he was doing nothing to do the same for me. My father had been right; I was insect, and I was about to be crushed.

Leon placed the muzzle of his gun at the hollow at the base of my neck. I turned my head toward Riku's figure, a sob racking my broken frame. Tears ran down my cheeks to mix with the mud and blood already plastered to my skin.

"Riku," I choked out in anguish, "Riku, please."

"Goodbye," Leon said, and placed his gloved finger over the trigger.

The gunshot echoed through the rain like the tolling of a bell. My heart stopped…and kept beating. I felt the gun being removed from my throat. I opened my eyes (when had I closed them?) to see Leon staring in shock at Cloud.

The blonde man was standing, completely rigid, his face a mix of shock and pain. He collapsed soundlessly, the mud muffling the sound as he hit the ground. Several seconds later, another gunshot ripped the air, and Leon folded into himself as if he had been punched in the gut. I raised my head a fraction of an inch to see Roxas standing there, breathing heavily, a gun clutched in his pale and shaking hands.

I fell back into the mud, each heartbeat a shock of pain. My eyes slid closed.

Suddenly, I felt someone slide their hands under my shoulders and pull my head into their lap. I cried out as the movement jarred my body, my clotted voice thick with torment. I felt a hand stroke my blood-streaked cheek.

"Sora, Sora, please, open your eyes, please Sora!"

Was I dead? I had to be. That was Riku's voice, and Riku didn't care if I died. My guess was that I was in heaven. If I had Riku here, I had heaven.

"Sora, I'm so sorry, please, I'm begging you, open your eyes!"

I wanted nothing more then to listen to my Riku-angel, but anything other than breathing was beyond me. Actually, breathing was becoming rather difficult, as well. Maybe if I just stopped for a moment…

"No, Sora, breathe! God, no, no, this can't happen!"

I felt another hand, a shakier one, placed over my heart. "He's going to die, Riku. If you want to say something, say it now. There's not much time."

Roxas? But he hadn't died too, had he? I tried to frown, but I had no control over my body. Heaven was so confusing.

I heard my Riku-angel sob. "Sora, listen, please. You were wrong—I care about you, more than anything. Roxas called me and explained to me everything that's happened. I didn't help you because we had to make Leon think I didn't care, so he wouldn't kill you immediately and so Roxas could catch them off-guard." He choked on another sob. "We waited too long, we let them go too far!"

I hadn't realized that I had started breathing again, but the pain in my chest alerted me to that fact. I exhaled slowly, my chest refusing to rise again. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew I had lost too much blood. It was over.

"Sora, no!"

"Give him to me. We need to get him to the hospital."

I felt myself get picked up, and I heard someone scream in torment. It took me a moment to realize it had been me.

"Riku, he probably won't make it…"

It was the last thing I heard before everything faded completely to black.


	14. Blue Roses

My funeral was a quiet, simple affair.

Kairi and Selphie had decorated my coffin with a huge spray of blue and white roses. They sat in the front row of chairs at the burial grounds, both looking small and pale in their black dresses, their cheeks streaked with tears and mascara. Next to them were Roxas, Axel, and, to my great surprise, my father. I had never expected him to be there, but I was glad he had come. In the rows behind them sat Hayner, Pence, Olette, and the friends I had left behind so many months before. I never realized that I knew so many people.

The priest finished reading the prayers and stepped back, silently motioning for anyone who'd like to come up and say a few words. A figure stepped forward from the back hesitantly, as if unsure whether or not he was welcome there.

"I'd like to say something," Riku said, and slowly walked to the front of the congregation. Even though he was sleep-deprived and worn, he still looked amazingly handsome in his black suit. He paused next to my coffin, one hand resting on the darkly polished wood. Silent tears fell steadily down his pale cheeks.

"Sora meant a lot to all of us, and I think you all deserve to know the reason why he…why he died." Riku kept his gaze trained on the roses the rested a few inches from his fingers. His voice was empty and broken, as if his will to live had been stolen away. He paused for a few seconds, trying to get his tears under control, before continuing.

"A year ago I was called for an assignment near the schoolyard where Sora was killed. I was supposed to go collect an unpaid debt from Leon and Cloud's business, but neither of them was there when I arrived. Two women were there, however, and they both knew the reason why I had come.

"Their names were Aerith and Yufie. Aerith was Cloud's wife, Yufie was Leon's sister. In a desperate attempt to save their family members from harm, they tried to force me to leave. The fight turned deadly, however, and in self-defense both women were killed. I'll never forgive myself for what happened.

"It didn't take long for Leon and Cloud to figure out what had happened, and that is when they began their hunt for revenge. They believed that if they killed the person I loved, it would be repayment for the damage I cost them. At first they went after Roxas. I knew in the end Roxas might die, so I hurt him in an effort to separate myself from him and, in the end, save him. It worked, and I left to try and lead Leon and Cloud away.

"When I returned, I met Sora. From the first time that I saw him I was in love with him. But things turned very wrong, very fast. Leon and Cloud had found their new target.

"I should have realized it was them when Sora found his apartment destroyed. But I was blinding myself to the truth in an effort to make myself believe that we would be allowed to live in peace. When Sora was beaten, I had a feeling it wasn't muggers, but again I pushed the hunch aside. I just wanted to be with Sora—I never wanted to have to do what I did to Roxas.

"But Sora knew. He knew that there were people who were after me, and he also knew that they were using him. So, he did what I had. He made me believe that he no longer loved me, so that I would cut him out of my life, and as a result, cut the danger out as well. When I finally realized the truth, it was too late. The plan to save him went wrong. We didn't even make it to the hospital before he was gone.

"Sora was brave. He was selfless. He loved passionately, and he died with equal passion. I have never loved anyone as I loved him, and I can say now that I will never love anyone like that again. My heart and soul are in that coffin with him. I'll never get them back."

Riku bent down and kissed my coffin softly, his tears staining the wood. "Goodbye, Sora," he whispered. "I love you."

Everyone stood up then and placed a rose on my coffin as it was lowered into the ground. There wasn't one person who wasn't crying.

People left then, silently walking back to their cars until Axel, Roxas, and Riku were the only ones left. They stood there silently, staring at the place where I had been buried.

"Sora, honey, are you ready to go?"

I looked over and smiled at my mother, looking as beautiful and vibrant as the day she had so tragically died. The only thing betraying that she was a ghost was the slight shimmering around her outline.

"Not yet, Mom." I turned back and continued watching Riku as he, alone now, kneeled in front of my grave and placed a hand on my headstone. From my position of leaning against a tree, I was just close enough to see as his tears fell to the grass like miniature rain.

My mother silently came up beside me and placed a hand on my shoulder. The weight of her hand felt odd to me; for some reason, I had expected to have no feeling at all. It was easy for me to forget that I was just as invisible as she was.

"You really love him, don't you?" she asked me, her voice soft.

"More than life itself," I said, and then grimaced at my choice of words. "Look how much pain I've caused him already; I just can't leave him."

My mother smiled and wrapped her arms around me. I leaned my head against her shoulder, just like I had when I was small. I had missed this so much.

"You won't leave him, Sora. You'll be able to watch over him at all times, just as I watched over you and your father. And then, when it's his time to cross over, you can bring him back with you, like I'm bringing you now," she said.

I nodded. "Just one last thing, okay?" I slipped out from underneath her shimmering arms and made my way to where Riku was. I knelt down beside him, filled with pain at the agony and despair written on his face. His silver hair laid flat against his tear-stained cheeks as he silently kneeled with his hand on my headstone. I reached my hand out to touch his face, but stopped, afraid that I wouldn't be able to feel him.

Instead, I watched him for what seemed like ages before I heard my mother's soft voice calling my name. I went to stand up, hesitated, and without a second thought, flung my arms around Riku. As I suspected, I couldn't feel him, but it was still worth it.

"I love you, Riku," I whispered against his ear, praying that he could hear me. "I'll always watch over you, I'll never leave you. I'll be here for you when it's your time. I'll be here."

I stood up, and without looking back, walked to where my mother was. She smiled and took my hand, and together we began to make our way to Heaven.

The End


End file.
